6am: Grandma Worth arrives to watch sleeping kids while we head in for a 6:45 check-in.
7am: We arrive in the labor and delivery room and enjoy bedside registration.
8am: Dr. Tashman successfully has half the stitches removed, but we decide we need an epidural before removing any more.
9am: Epidural. Ahhhh.
10am: More searching for stitches to be removed. Dr. Tashman snipped the last stitch but didn't remove the thread.
11am: It looks like I'm in good labor, so we decide to leave things alone for now, and see how it progresses.
12noon: Still laboring. Yeah for epidurals. Sleeping and watching TV.
1pm: Not really progressing, so we decide to try Pitocin to speed up the contractions. Dr. Tashman comes in an ups the pitocin level, which causes Samuel's heart rate to drop, so we turn it off.
2pm: Back to waiting for natural labor progression.
3pm: Sleeping, watching TV, sleeping, watching TV. Not much on other than crazy hostage crisis in MD on every local and national news channel.
4pm: Dr. Tashman removed the last stitch, thinking it was still keeping things tight even though it was snipped. With all the stitches removed, we decide to try Pitocin again and it crashes Samuel (again) and Nancy, so we stop again. Latest theory is the umbilical cord is pinched or wrapped around Samuel somehow, maybe around his neck.
5pm: One more try with Pitocin but the recovery between crashes is too long. Natural contractions starting to weaken and slow instead of progressing.
6pm: There is mention of a C-section in our near future if labor doesn't progress beyond this point.
7pm: Samuel starts crashing even without Pitocin and my temperature reaches 99.9 so we quickly decide to go ahead with a C-section, which had been discussed and prayed about for the last hour.
8pm: I am in the OR with Richard in scrubs by my head, holding my hand and ready with the camera.
8:07pm: Samuel is born :) No complications, nothing is wrong. Dr. T says the cord was too short for Samuel to have ever gone through the birth canal. We cry for joy.
9pm: I join Samuel and Richard in post-op recovery.
10pm: We hear that all of Samuel's tests are normal, even though he is considered late pre-term (37.5 weeks). I get to drink something other than water for the first time in 24 hours.
11pm: We finally settle into our postpartum room.
11:01pm: ZZzzzzzzz....
7am: We arrive in the labor and delivery room and enjoy bedside registration.
8am: Dr. Tashman successfully has half the stitches removed, but we decide we need an epidural before removing any more.
9am: Epidural. Ahhhh.
10am: More searching for stitches to be removed. Dr. Tashman snipped the last stitch but didn't remove the thread.
11am: It looks like I'm in good labor, so we decide to leave things alone for now, and see how it progresses.
12noon: Still laboring. Yeah for epidurals. Sleeping and watching TV.
1pm: Not really progressing, so we decide to try Pitocin to speed up the contractions. Dr. Tashman comes in an ups the pitocin level, which causes Samuel's heart rate to drop, so we turn it off.
2pm: Back to waiting for natural labor progression.
3pm: Sleeping, watching TV, sleeping, watching TV. Not much on other than crazy hostage crisis in MD on every local and national news channel.
4pm: Dr. Tashman removed the last stitch, thinking it was still keeping things tight even though it was snipped. With all the stitches removed, we decide to try Pitocin again and it crashes Samuel (again) and Nancy, so we stop again. Latest theory is the umbilical cord is pinched or wrapped around Samuel somehow, maybe around his neck.
5pm: One more try with Pitocin but the recovery between crashes is too long. Natural contractions starting to weaken and slow instead of progressing.
6pm: There is mention of a C-section in our near future if labor doesn't progress beyond this point.
7pm: Samuel starts crashing even without Pitocin and my temperature reaches 99.9 so we quickly decide to go ahead with a C-section, which had been discussed and prayed about for the last hour.
8pm: I am in the OR with Richard in scrubs by my head, holding my hand and ready with the camera.
8:07pm: Samuel is born :) No complications, nothing is wrong. Dr. T says the cord was too short for Samuel to have ever gone through the birth canal. We cry for joy.
9pm: I join Samuel and Richard in post-op recovery.
10pm: We hear that all of Samuel's tests are normal, even though he is considered late pre-term (37.5 weeks). I get to drink something other than water for the first time in 24 hours.
11pm: We finally settle into our postpartum room.
11:01pm: ZZzzzzzzz....
8:07pm
6lbs 8oz
19 3/4in
Leading the witness
I’m not a prisoner and don’t want to be even though marriage may feel like that for some people. Other people of course, not me. And this situation doesn’t really fit the classic definition of a prisoner’s dilemma. And I’m certainly not a witness.
But I do feel like I am close to being held captive. And this is a dilemma. And I do feel like I am being led down a dark path.
While driving in the car yesterday my wife suddenly said, “You have an opportunity to score some points. You can say something nice.”
As feeling slowly left my legs and my stomach rolled like the ocean, I desperately tried to interpret this. Why didn’t she just tell me what happened so I could praise her? We both could have won. Instead, she gave me the opportunity to win big or lose big. The crazy thing is that if I lose she will be angry and also lose. I guess the payout is good for her if I can imagine up whatever she wants me to say – she would be really happy.
“Well, you did a great job organizing the office,” I said. “Was that it?” She replied with a no. ” I then pleaded, “Why don’t you give me a hint so I can try to be your mind.” She was a little annoyed and said to forget it. Just then we got interrupted.
I ask you now, what could she have meant? I need some ideas before she asks me again. I don’t think it had to do with looks because she just mentioned that she hasn’t had a haircut for a while and her clothes looked pretty standard. It must be something she accomplished.
Happy Baby Eve!
OK, I admit it, it finally seems like I can truly see the end of this road. I'm excited! Tomorrow, early in the morning, we head to the hospital to meet Samuel.
I've finished my baby shower/meal bringing/helping-however thank you notes.
I only have a few stitches left on my embroidery project for Samuel.
I've written up reminder notes for Ruth since she'll be taking over for a few days.
I've written up instructions for Ruth, with questions to ask and paperwork to return, since she'll be taking all 3 kids to their school Open Houses on Friday.
I've packed my bag with a tiny outfit for Samuel, a huge outfit for me, and the coziest baby blanket ever.
The infant seat is in Richard's car, ready to go.
The camera batteries are charged.
And here's one last shot of my belly. Not that different looking from the 35 week shot by appearance, but I can tell that Samuel has dropped. He's just hanging out, waiting for those stitches to be removed so that he can just slide on out.
Soon, Samuel. Soon.
OK, I admit it, it finally seems like I can truly see the end of this road. I'm excited! Tomorrow, early in the morning, we head to the hospital to meet Samuel.
I've finished my baby shower/meal bringing/helping-however thank you notes.
I only have a few stitches left on my embroidery project for Samuel.
I've written up reminder notes for Ruth since she'll be taking over for a few days.
I've written up instructions for Ruth, with questions to ask and paperwork to return, since she'll be taking all 3 kids to their school Open Houses on Friday.
I've packed my bag with a tiny outfit for Samuel, a huge outfit for me, and the coziest baby blanket ever.
The infant seat is in Richard's car, ready to go.
The camera batteries are charged.
And here's one last shot of my belly. Not that different looking from the 35 week shot by appearance, but I can tell that Samuel has dropped. He's just hanging out, waiting for those stitches to be removed so that he can just slide on out.
Soon, Samuel. Soon.I thought I'd better balance out that last grumpy post with some of my happy thoughts.
My biggest happy thoughts come from this bassinet. I love it. It's beautiful and it makes me think of beautiful, small babies laying in it and sleeping happily.
Inside the bassinet, I lay one of Samuel's sweet, small outfits - to remind me again about the baby that will soon sleep there.
Taped to my cupboard are two lists. The one on the right is entitled "Samuel's Sudden Labor Plan" and has names and phone numbers of people who would have been called in to help had we needed to leave for the hospital in a hurry. My happy thought is that now, taped on the left cupboard, is another list entitled "The Official Schedule" that has each day this week listed and what is happening, who is in charge, who is bringing dinner, etc. So that the bevy of helpers and caregivers and parents can all stay on the same page. We made it to the actually planned part!
And finally, Ambien. It makes me happy. Sleep is very hard for me to come by these days, so each night I take one Ambien, climb into bed, and read by flashlight (so it doesn't bother Richard) until I literally drop the book in exhaustion. (I usually have to re-read the last few pages the next day because I was so out of it that I don't remember them.)
As the song goes, these are a few of my favorite things.
My biggest happy thoughts come from this bassinet. I love it. It's beautiful and it makes me think of beautiful, small babies laying in it and sleeping happily.
Inside the bassinet, I lay one of Samuel's sweet, small outfits - to remind me again about the baby that will soon sleep there.
Taped to my cupboard are two lists. The one on the right is entitled "Samuel's Sudden Labor Plan" and has names and phone numbers of people who would have been called in to help had we needed to leave for the hospital in a hurry. My happy thought is that now, taped on the left cupboard, is another list entitled "The Official Schedule" that has each day this week listed and what is happening, who is in charge, who is bringing dinner, etc. So that the bevy of helpers and caregivers and parents can all stay on the same page. We made it to the actually planned part!
And finally, Ambien. It makes me happy. Sleep is very hard for me to come by these days, so each night I take one Ambien, climb into bed, and read by flashlight (so it doesn't bother Richard) until I literally drop the book in exhaustion. (I usually have to re-read the last few pages the next day because I was so out of it that I don't remember them.)
As the song goes, these are a few of my favorite things.Alright, People. No more Miss Perky. Several of you have expressed the view that I should be feeling great at this point since I'm so close to the end of my "confinement". Well, let me tell ya, that just means I've got 4 months of suckage behind me. And I'm tired of it. No "end in sight" is gonna be good enough until it's in my rear view mirror. I'm tired. I'm now in physical pain. I'm tired of being not in control. I'm tired of thinking over and over the future and running every scenario. I'm tired of my children looking at me when I tell them to do something and then ignoring me because they know I can't back any threats up with action. I'm tired of having to make lunch requests from the couch. I'm tired of thinking "such and such needs to washed/cleaned/done" and then having to wait for days until someone asks me what they can do to help. I'm tired of having nothing on my schedule for the entire day. I'm tired of making up things to put on my schedule just to feel more fulfilled. I'm tired of people serving me. I'm tired of feeling like crap. I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of sacrificing the other three kids for the sake of one. I'm tired of being tired or so many things.
I'm tired, People. So stop telling me I should be perky. It just makes me cry more, at this point. It's not over til it's over. And it's not over yet!
(I know this is a ridiculously grumpy post and I'll probably regret it later and maybe even remove it, but for now it feels pretty good to just be honest.)
I'm tired, People. So stop telling me I should be perky. It just makes me cry more, at this point. It's not over til it's over. And it's not over yet!
(I know this is a ridiculously grumpy post and I'll probably regret it later and maybe even remove it, but for now it feels pretty good to just be honest.)
Well it's the end of August and here in PA that means the start of school. Can I just say, for the record, I don't like it, not one bit. Avery started kindergarten yesterday. This means that after the easing in period she will be going to school all day as well. That means both my girls, my helpers, my friends are going to be gone ALL day. Nope don't like it, not one bit. On the brighter side Avery was extremely excited to start school. She has Ashby's kindergarten teacher which is wonderful. Ashby says she isn't excited, but she comes home happy so it can't be all bad. What are Luke and I supposed to do all day without them?
Here's Avery on her first day. She is all skirts and sparkles.
Here's Ashby on her first day, she's all tennis shoes and boy backpacks!
In other changes Avery finally lost her first tooth. She kept waiting and waiting and finally got it out. Her permanent tooth is all the way in behind it. Yikes.
In other sad yet happy yet necessary yet watch Chelsea eat her words news, we traded in our Jeep. I loved the Jeep, but not lately. It had issues that were too expensive to fix and had 168,000 miles on it, so I guess it was time.
We got this instead. It's painful to share with the world because I've always said I would never drive a minivan. Turns out we aren't in a position to afford the Suburban I would like, so this is what we came home with instead. To my credit it's a Honda which we love and it will last forever, which is good or bad if you're me and want something else sometime before 2035.
The timing of the new car couldn't have been better because another big change (pictured below) will be coming on or around March 12th.
Beginners at doing chores, that is. I've often asked my kids to help with this or that, but before I was on bed rest for 4 months, the boys didn't even dress themselves, or (ew, sorry) brush their teeth daily. I figured that with school starting soon, it was time to change that.
Someone gave me this great, medium-sized, whiteboard a while back and I knew just what I wanted to do with it. Using only Microsoft Word and their included graphics, I created this chore chart. Then I printed it on a transparency, and attached it to the white board by sticking the edges of the transparency under the lip of the front of the white board and two pieces of tape just to be sure. Then Richard found these magnets at the office supply store which were just white, but using colored Sharpies, they were easily turned into color coded markers for each child.
The chores on the list are hardly even "chores". They're really just daily basics. But the point of this for our family is to train the kids in two things. One, taking the responsibility each day for getting themselves ready. And two, the idea of having chores at all which need to be done before the fun stuff happens each day. Once they master these things, it'll be easy to swap out the transparency with some more advanced chores.
For now, for us, this is perfect.
Someone gave me this great, medium-sized, whiteboard a while back and I knew just what I wanted to do with it. Using only Microsoft Word and their included graphics, I created this chore chart. Then I printed it on a transparency, and attached it to the white board by sticking the edges of the transparency under the lip of the front of the white board and two pieces of tape just to be sure. Then Richard found these magnets at the office supply store which were just white, but using colored Sharpies, they were easily turned into color coded markers for each child.
The chores on the list are hardly even "chores". They're really just daily basics. But the point of this for our family is to train the kids in two things. One, taking the responsibility each day for getting themselves ready. And two, the idea of having chores at all which need to be done before the fun stuff happens each day. Once they master these things, it'll be easy to swap out the transparency with some more advanced chores.For now, for us, this is perfect.
Naomi just finished her 10-week summer gymnastics class. She had a great time and really pushed herself to try new things without fear. This place was a real gymnastics training facility, not just a kiddie place. In fact, several Olympians train there right now! So she got to try things like jumping and/or flipping into a pit full of foam blocks, the uneven bars, flipping on a long straight trampoline, the parallel bars, etc. I never got to go see her do it, of course, but Nanny Amy took pictures during this last class (which wasn't easy since it's against the rules to take pictures in there - maybe because of the creep-factor with all those little girls in leotards, and maybe because there are secret Olympic routines being practiced).
I'm so proud of Naomi for never backing down from anything the teacher asked. She says that she even encouraged other children who were afraid to try some things. I'd love to keep her in gymnastics longer, but I think we'll just sit out this session - what with a new baby and school starting and all that. I'll put her back in after things settle down a bit.
I'm so proud of Naomi for never backing down from anything the teacher asked. She says that she even encouraged other children who were afraid to try some things. I'd love to keep her in gymnastics longer, but I think we'll just sit out this session - what with a new baby and school starting and all that. I'll put her back in after things settle down a bit.My birthday was last week. And what a week it was!
Tuesday: Dr's appointment in the morning, and the Young Women from my ward dropped by for a surprise party that evening including cupcakes, ice cream, and the game Apples to Apples (which was interesting since these young women didn't know what half the cards were - including who Jack Nicholson and Keanu Reeves are).
Wednesday: My bookclub was at my house and while we didn't technically celebrate my birthday, it was something for me to look forward to all day.
Thursday: Had a nice dinner and birthday cake with just my little family. Ice cream cake! Watched a silly movie with Richard and Ruthie.
The kids made this great collection of art for me with the help of Nanny Amy.
Richard gave me the most rockin' rainboots I've ever seen in my life!
My parents gave me a sweet necklace stamped with my new life motto: Choose Happiness.
Friday: Invited two of my best girlfriends over for some good chatting, Boggle playing, and general catching up after a long somewhat-isolated summer apart.
Saturday: A small hiatus from partying on, except for eating leftover ice cream cake.
Sunday: A big combined Worth birthday party for me, my SIL Kelly, and my sis Ruthie. Loads of fun. And more cake - this time chocolate!
Whew! I milked that for all it was worth!
Now just 8 days to go before the best present of all - Samuel!
Tuesday: Dr's appointment in the morning, and the Young Women from my ward dropped by for a surprise party that evening including cupcakes, ice cream, and the game Apples to Apples (which was interesting since these young women didn't know what half the cards were - including who Jack Nicholson and Keanu Reeves are).
Wednesday: My bookclub was at my house and while we didn't technically celebrate my birthday, it was something for me to look forward to all day.
Thursday: Had a nice dinner and birthday cake with just my little family. Ice cream cake! Watched a silly movie with Richard and Ruthie.
The kids made this great collection of art for me with the help of Nanny Amy.
Richard gave me the most rockin' rainboots I've ever seen in my life!
My parents gave me a sweet necklace stamped with my new life motto: Choose Happiness.
Friday: Invited two of my best girlfriends over for some good chatting, Boggle playing, and general catching up after a long somewhat-isolated summer apart.
Saturday: A small hiatus from partying on, except for eating leftover ice cream cake.
Sunday: A big combined Worth birthday party for me, my SIL Kelly, and my sis Ruthie. Loads of fun. And more cake - this time chocolate!
Whew! I milked that for all it was worth! Now just 8 days to go before the best present of all - Samuel!
I had a doctor's appointment again today and received some very grand, truly blessed, news.
I'll try not to be too graphic, but basically, as my doctor was checking my cervix and the stitches he inserted there three months ago, he said, "Your cervix is still nice and thick. That is very heartening news! I think that if you were to have more children, and we put the stitches in at 20 weeks or so, you might not even end up on bed rest! Your cervix is just doing so great!"
I can't think of many things that he could have said at that moment that would have made me happier! I've been trying very hard not to worry about the having-more-children-in-the-future issue at this point. I've been trying to just be happy that we're going to get Samuel. But I know we've got at least one more spirit up in heaven, after Samuel, just waiting for his/her turn to come into our family. Our family just isn't complete yet. And to receive the news that maybe it won't be quite as hard to get him/her down to Earth as it was to get Samuel, is just so wonderful!
What a true blessing from our Heavenly Father. And following so closely on the heals of so many other true blessings, it feels almost indulgent.
*I am crying just a little bit. With joy and gratitude.*
In other news, after getting everything all set for a September 2 delivery, my doctor has rescheduled me for September 1. Hard to argue with getting this boy here a day earlier, but now I need to start re-planning things!
I'll try not to be too graphic, but basically, as my doctor was checking my cervix and the stitches he inserted there three months ago, he said, "Your cervix is still nice and thick. That is very heartening news! I think that if you were to have more children, and we put the stitches in at 20 weeks or so, you might not even end up on bed rest! Your cervix is just doing so great!"
I can't think of many things that he could have said at that moment that would have made me happier! I've been trying very hard not to worry about the having-more-children-in-the-future issue at this point. I've been trying to just be happy that we're going to get Samuel. But I know we've got at least one more spirit up in heaven, after Samuel, just waiting for his/her turn to come into our family. Our family just isn't complete yet. And to receive the news that maybe it won't be quite as hard to get him/her down to Earth as it was to get Samuel, is just so wonderful!
What a true blessing from our Heavenly Father. And following so closely on the heals of so many other true blessings, it feels almost indulgent.
*I am crying just a little bit. With joy and gratitude.*
In other news, after getting everything all set for a September 2 delivery, my doctor has rescheduled me for September 1. Hard to argue with getting this boy here a day earlier, but now I need to start re-planning things!
My sister, Angela, did a post yesterday on her blog about how thankful she is to have her loving husband as a "very supportive partner". Then she listed several examples of how he has helped her get the rest and nourishment she needs (she is expecting, too). And it got me thinking that I could certainly do a similar post for Richard. Certainly Richard has been going the extra mile (or 10) the last few months. He often acts as Dad and Mom.
But as I started thinking about the specific examples that I could use to copy Angela's post pattern, my thinking changed a little. What I am feeling most thankful for right now is not all the things that Richard does for me - even though they are numerous and could take up pages and pages if I started writing them down. What I am feeling most thankful for is the times when he and I can work together.
I am most thankful when I can work side-by-side with my companion. When we can co-parent. Tag team. Using each other's assets to the benefit of our family. Genesis tells us that "it is not good that man should be alone." I feel like in some ways Richard has had to work alone during this small trial of ours. And, in some ways, I have had to work alone, too, to grow this baby. But, in the end, we have each other to lean on. We know that the other has our backs.
I wish I was more eloquent so that I could express more deeply how thankful I am for Richard. More fully describe to you how hard he has been working. And to express my thanks for a normally healthy body that allows me to work beside my companion day after day.
Just to brag about my awesome husband a bit, here are a few examples of things Richard does for me every day (sometimes multiple times per day):
Refills my water, time after time
Fetches my pills
Brings me breakfast, often in bed
Thinks of my needs and wants when he's out running errands, bringing me treats and lunches and other things for my enjoyment
Wears a Breathe-Right strip at night since I sleep so delicately at this phase
Makes me cookies on demand (often)
There are plenty more things he does, not only for me but for our family, but those are a few of my favorites.
But as I started thinking about the specific examples that I could use to copy Angela's post pattern, my thinking changed a little. What I am feeling most thankful for right now is not all the things that Richard does for me - even though they are numerous and could take up pages and pages if I started writing them down. What I am feeling most thankful for is the times when he and I can work together.
I am most thankful when I can work side-by-side with my companion. When we can co-parent. Tag team. Using each other's assets to the benefit of our family. Genesis tells us that "it is not good that man should be alone." I feel like in some ways Richard has had to work alone during this small trial of ours. And, in some ways, I have had to work alone, too, to grow this baby. But, in the end, we have each other to lean on. We know that the other has our backs.
I wish I was more eloquent so that I could express more deeply how thankful I am for Richard. More fully describe to you how hard he has been working. And to express my thanks for a normally healthy body that allows me to work beside my companion day after day.
Just to brag about my awesome husband a bit, here are a few examples of things Richard does for me every day (sometimes multiple times per day):
Refills my water, time after time
Fetches my pills
Brings me breakfast, often in bed
Thinks of my needs and wants when he's out running errands, bringing me treats and lunches and other things for my enjoyment
Wears a Breathe-Right strip at night since I sleep so delicately at this phase
Makes me cookies on demand (often)
There are plenty more things he does, not only for me but for our family, but those are a few of my favorites.
Months ago I blogged about wanting this particularly fabulous argyle pattern car seat (called Brunswick) for little Sammy. I didn't buy it right then because it was still early and I figured I had plenty of time. But then, for the last month or so, I've been trying to order it online only to discover that it's out of stock everywhere! Apparently I'm not the only person who thinks it's fabulous!
Anyway, today, in my daily stalking of Amazon.com, I discovered that one seller had it in stock! So I quickly ordered it - paying full price for it, rather than the Amazon discounted rate. But now I'm worried that they were just messing with me. They claim it will ship between August 24 and 27. That's cutting it pretty close! It had better be here before September 2, or we're in trouble!!
(I just realized that there are quite a few exclamation marks in this post. Apparently I feel strongly about this car seat!!!!!)
Anyway, today, in my daily stalking of Amazon.com, I discovered that one seller had it in stock! So I quickly ordered it - paying full price for it, rather than the Amazon discounted rate. But now I'm worried that they were just messing with me. They claim it will ship between August 24 and 27. That's cutting it pretty close! It had better be here before September 2, or we're in trouble!!
(I just realized that there are quite a few exclamation marks in this post. Apparently I feel strongly about this car seat!!!!!)
Technically, I'm one day shy of 35 weeks, but close enough.
He's still growing and growing! My doctor says his measurements are right on target where they should be.
My sister, Angela, just announced that she is expecting too. So now I'm picturing Samuel up in heaven with his little cousin, peaking over the edge of a cloud together, anticipating what fun and mischief they'll make on Earth together.
He's still growing and growing! My doctor says his measurements are right on target where they should be.My sister, Angela, just announced that she is expecting too. So now I'm picturing Samuel up in heaven with his little cousin, peaking over the edge of a cloud together, anticipating what fun and mischief they'll make on Earth together.
After a long chat with my doctor today, I successfully convinced him that September 2 should be the big day! Of course, that doesn't mean that Samuel can't decide to come sooner than that - but he's not coming any later than that! On September 2, assuming nothing has happened before that, I'll go into the hospital, get my epidural, the doc'll take out the stitches, then he'll induce me. That's the plan.
And now that I have the plan, all that's left to worry about is Samuel not sticking to the plan. I could certainly still go into labor at any time. And if I did, the stitches would start pulling and it wouldn't be fun.
But the end is in sight! Wa-whoo!!!
And now that I have the plan, all that's left to worry about is Samuel not sticking to the plan. I could certainly still go into labor at any time. And if I did, the stitches would start pulling and it wouldn't be fun.
But the end is in sight! Wa-whoo!!!
Saturday night was the awesome baby shower for Samuel. It was so fun for me to get out of the house and be surrounded by my friends and even some family.
Below is the beautiful cake that my sister, Ruth, made for the shower. You know I love me some purple and green!
The house the shower was in was perfect since the chaise stuck out into the middle of the room. I lay there, in the middle of things, loving every minute of it. In the midst of it all, this room was packed wall to wall. I don't really know how many people came, but I would guess between 20 and 30. Some of those people I haven't seen in 3 months. It was so great to see everybody.
We played a game at the very beginning where the host puts a sticker on everybody's back with the name of a famous person on it. Then you have to ask the other guests yes/no questions to figure out "who you are". I was Cleopatra, and I have to admit, I felt a bit like the reigning Queen laying in the middle of my loyal subjects. All that was missing was the palm fronds to wave before me.
My Aunt even came all the way from Alexandria. And, of course, Ruth.
And here is the friend who made it all happen - Stephanie. She is such a sweet friend. I feel so blessed to be so loved by such great people.
Of course, Samuel was very loved at this party, too. I think my friends feel a little more invested in this baby than usual since they've been routing for him and praying for him and helping me take care of him for so long now. Samuel got some lovely gifts. I'm thankful that he'll have a few new things of his very own that aren't hand-me-downs.
Below is the beautiful cake that my sister, Ruth, made for the shower. You know I love me some purple and green!
The house the shower was in was perfect since the chaise stuck out into the middle of the room. I lay there, in the middle of things, loving every minute of it. In the midst of it all, this room was packed wall to wall. I don't really know how many people came, but I would guess between 20 and 30. Some of those people I haven't seen in 3 months. It was so great to see everybody.We played a game at the very beginning where the host puts a sticker on everybody's back with the name of a famous person on it. Then you have to ask the other guests yes/no questions to figure out "who you are". I was Cleopatra, and I have to admit, I felt a bit like the reigning Queen laying in the middle of my loyal subjects. All that was missing was the palm fronds to wave before me.
My Aunt even came all the way from Alexandria. And, of course, Ruth.
And here is the friend who made it all happen - Stephanie. She is such a sweet friend. I feel so blessed to be so loved by such great people.
Of course, Samuel was very loved at this party, too. I think my friends feel a little more invested in this baby than usual since they've been routing for him and praying for him and helping me take care of him for so long now. Samuel got some lovely gifts. I'm thankful that he'll have a few new things of his very own that aren't hand-me-downs.I climb into bed after a long day
I lay my head on my soft pillow
And enjoy sinking into the mattress.
I am ready for sleep.
But then my legs start twitching.
And the baby starts kicking.
And my neck starts itching.
And my mind starts racing.
I turn and heave my belly to the other side.
I toss around for an hour.
I get up to pee.
Maybe it will help.
I stretch my legs.
Maybe it will help.
I lay down again.
I try to control my breathing.
Maybe it will help.
I am ready for sleep.
But then my legs keep twitching.
And the baby keeps kicking.
And my back keeps itching.
And my mind keeps racing.
I am ready for sleep.
But instead I lay awake.
Tomorrow I’ll take an Ambien.
I lay my head on my soft pillow
And enjoy sinking into the mattress.
I am ready for sleep.
But then my legs start twitching.
And the baby starts kicking.
And my neck starts itching.
And my mind starts racing.
I turn and heave my belly to the other side.
I toss around for an hour.
I get up to pee.
Maybe it will help.
I stretch my legs.
Maybe it will help.
I lay down again.
I try to control my breathing.
Maybe it will help.
I am ready for sleep.
But then my legs keep twitching.
And the baby keeps kicking.
And my back keeps itching.
And my mind keeps racing.
I am ready for sleep.
But instead I lay awake.
Tomorrow I’ll take an Ambien.
After a pretty good start on the potty train, Isaiah stalled. I'm sure that's because we were being inconsistent. Nanny Amy did a great job in the mornings, but then in the afternoons we would often just leave his naptime diaper on him. Our afternoon babysitter is only 13 and I just don't feel like she can handle the nuances of potty training. But I realized this inconsistency was a problem when I heard Isaiah say to Amy, "I not need go potty, Daddy say I just pee in my diaper." - even though he was actually wearing underwear at the time. Also, I realized Isaiah was hesitant to sit on the toilet long enough to give it a good try because he's so small that it was uncomfortable and scary. So I ordered a potty seat, a special book for him to read while he waits, and extra Hot Wheels as motivation. The potty seat is the kind that sits on top of the regular potty seat to make the hole smaller. The book makes him slow down and wait. And the Hot Wheels get him excited about actually peeing in the toilet as opposed to just trying. He gets candy for just trying.
Anyway, with this new scheme, plus me cheating on my bed rest a bit each afternoon so that I can be sitting outside the bathroom talking to him while he does his thing, we've been having a lot more success. In fact, we haven't had an accident since the box from Amazon.com arrived yesterday with the seat and book. I'm hoping this is the turn-around, the click, the last piece that makes it work, that happens with every kid who goes through this.
Or maybe we still have a long road ahead of us. But I'm trying to stay positive!
***This afternoon, after nap time, Isaiah ran to the bathroom all on his own, hollering "potty! potty!", took off his nap time diaper, and peed in the toilet! It's really looking like he's got it!***
Anyway, with this new scheme, plus me cheating on my bed rest a bit each afternoon so that I can be sitting outside the bathroom talking to him while he does his thing, we've been having a lot more success. In fact, we haven't had an accident since the box from Amazon.com arrived yesterday with the seat and book. I'm hoping this is the turn-around, the click, the last piece that makes it work, that happens with every kid who goes through this.
Or maybe we still have a long road ahead of us. But I'm trying to stay positive!
***This afternoon, after nap time, Isaiah ran to the bathroom all on his own, hollering "potty! potty!", took off his nap time diaper, and peed in the toilet! It's really looking like he's got it!***
(you should read pretty much this entire post in a begrudging, somewhat reluctant, grumpy tone.)
You all win. I've decided to wait until September 2 to have Samuel. After hearing a few horror stories and discussing my plan with my friend who is a post-natal nurse, I guess I have to agree that it would be silly to wait this long for Samuel and then force him to come out too early. Especially since my main concern with waiting until September 2 was just it being too close to when the other kids start school (Sept. 7). So, to calm that concern, I talked with my Mom about her definitely being here by then to help dote on my children on their first day of school. That makes me feel a little bit better. And doing what I think is best for Samuel helps me feel a little bit better, too. Plus, September 2 is less than a month away! I can live with that.
These decisions that I have to make between helping one of my children or the others really suck. Give Samuel a healthy birthday, or be there (emotionally) for the other three kids on their first day of school. Give Samuel a healthy birthday, or properly potty train Isaiah (which has to happen before Sept 7 when school starts or else Isaiah can't start school as planned). Choose, choose, choose. I really hate this feeling.
You all win. I've decided to wait until September 2 to have Samuel. After hearing a few horror stories and discussing my plan with my friend who is a post-natal nurse, I guess I have to agree that it would be silly to wait this long for Samuel and then force him to come out too early. Especially since my main concern with waiting until September 2 was just it being too close to when the other kids start school (Sept. 7). So, to calm that concern, I talked with my Mom about her definitely being here by then to help dote on my children on their first day of school. That makes me feel a little bit better. And doing what I think is best for Samuel helps me feel a little bit better, too. Plus, September 2 is less than a month away! I can live with that.
These decisions that I have to make between helping one of my children or the others really suck. Give Samuel a healthy birthday, or be there (emotionally) for the other three kids on their first day of school. Give Samuel a healthy birthday, or properly potty train Isaiah (which has to happen before Sept 7 when school starts or else Isaiah can't start school as planned). Choose, choose, choose. I really hate this feeling.
Name that tune
I know lots of you dads are subjected to the endless cds of kids sing along songs while driving in the car. Some of the most annoying ones are John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt, Six Little Ducks, She’ll Be Comin’ Round The Mountain, The Green Grass Grew All Around, and of course The Song That Doesn’t End. If you are really unlucky, your wife might even play these in the house.
I’ve recently been spending more time in the car with the kids and have noticed several things about these songs. First, many have a religious tone. I was surprised to see Battle Hymn of the Republic on a ton of kids cds. I think that can be a good thing. Second, there are a lot about men. You should search it if you don’t believe me. I think I’ve found at least 15 with some guy’s name in the title. I guess that’s not too bad, but I’ve also noticed a third thing: they seem to be laced with double meanings and weird messages. Some are less obvious than others but trust me on this too. I want to focus on a song that involves the second and third realizations I’ve just discovered.
The song is called John Brown’s Baby. There are only two lines in the entire song, but like most of these songs, kids sing the lines over and over again which causes the adult mind to tune out the lyrics while innocent children are brainwashed. The lines are:
John Brown’s baby had a cold upon his chest
So they rubbed it with camphorated oil.
That’s not too bad, but after these lines are sung several times the children are encouraged to remove a word and replace it with a silly sound effect. Typically the first word removed is ‘baby.’ On our cd the word is replaced with a noise that sounds like a penny whistle. Kids sing the lines a few times and then remove a second word which is usually ‘cold.’ This is also replaced with a strange sound effect. At this point there are now two words which are replaced by sounds. This continues until you hear this:
John Brown’s (blank) had a (blank) upon its (blank)
So they (blanked) it with (blank) oil.
I don’t think I would have caught this clever deception if it weren’t for the weird penny whistle sound that immediately followed John Brown’s name. Come on. Am I to really believe that this song wasn’t made up by a bunch of inmates during recess time on the shanking field? This had to be the strangest thing I have ever heard in my life, and my wife was supporting the entire thing! I guess I’m no longer the number one offender for letting kids watch/listen to questionable material.
(NOTE: I tried to find a link so you could hear the song about John Brown’s blank and judge for yourself, but I can only find sites that require a download and don’t want to promote them. Maybe someone can find it for everyone else.)
I've decided that Samuel's birthday should be August 26.
Here's why: First of all, he should be born on a Thursday because that's my doctor's day to be in the hospital all day and do all his planned deliveries (c-sections, inducements, surgeries, etc.). August 26 is the Thursday that I choose because Samuel'll be 36.5 weeks at that point. Some places I've read say that 37 weeks is counted as full term (I've always heard 38 weeks was full term, but who am I to argue with the internet?), so really August 26 is only a few days early. And, August 26 is this month! That just sounds good to me... to know that I'll be having a baby this month. Plus, I'm worried about this baby getting too big when I have absolutely no muscles left to push him out. I really, really worry that it'd become one of those situations where I push and push until I'm over-exhausted and then they have to do a c-section because I'm passed out. So earlier is better in that way.
Richard says I should wait one week more than that, until September 2. But school starts on September 7 and I want things to be a little more stable for the other kids before then.
Of course, all of this is mostly irrelevant. What I want, or what Richard wants, is really not the most important thing is this situation. It's about what's best for Samuel (she admits, grudgingly). If my doctor told me that it would be better to wait until September 2, or even the 9th, I would. Bitterly, but I would.
I have another appointment on August 10 and I'll discuss this plan with my doc then. We'll see what he thinks about it. He asked my opinion on the matter at my last appointment and I told him that I promised I would not have the baby before August 7, which is my baby shower, but that after that I made no promises. He laughed and patted me on the shoulder. So we'll just have to wait until August 10 to see what he really thinks.
So that puts you up to date on the circle that I think through every 5 minutes of every day. What I want, what Richard wants, what's best for the baby, what the doctor will say, what I want, what Richard wants, etc. Over and over. And over. Maybe it helps me feel in control. But every mother knows that sometimes you just really aren't in control of when a baby comes. I may get no say in the matter whatsoever. Gosh darn it.
Here's why: First of all, he should be born on a Thursday because that's my doctor's day to be in the hospital all day and do all his planned deliveries (c-sections, inducements, surgeries, etc.). August 26 is the Thursday that I choose because Samuel'll be 36.5 weeks at that point. Some places I've read say that 37 weeks is counted as full term (I've always heard 38 weeks was full term, but who am I to argue with the internet?), so really August 26 is only a few days early. And, August 26 is this month! That just sounds good to me... to know that I'll be having a baby this month. Plus, I'm worried about this baby getting too big when I have absolutely no muscles left to push him out. I really, really worry that it'd become one of those situations where I push and push until I'm over-exhausted and then they have to do a c-section because I'm passed out. So earlier is better in that way.
Richard says I should wait one week more than that, until September 2. But school starts on September 7 and I want things to be a little more stable for the other kids before then.
Of course, all of this is mostly irrelevant. What I want, or what Richard wants, is really not the most important thing is this situation. It's about what's best for Samuel (she admits, grudgingly). If my doctor told me that it would be better to wait until September 2, or even the 9th, I would. Bitterly, but I would.
I have another appointment on August 10 and I'll discuss this plan with my doc then. We'll see what he thinks about it. He asked my opinion on the matter at my last appointment and I told him that I promised I would not have the baby before August 7, which is my baby shower, but that after that I made no promises. He laughed and patted me on the shoulder. So we'll just have to wait until August 10 to see what he really thinks.
So that puts you up to date on the circle that I think through every 5 minutes of every day. What I want, what Richard wants, what's best for the baby, what the doctor will say, what I want, what Richard wants, etc. Over and over. And over. Maybe it helps me feel in control. But every mother knows that sometimes you just really aren't in control of when a baby comes. I may get no say in the matter whatsoever. Gosh darn it.
Since the very first day that I was home on bed rest, I've been telling the kids that the great part is that I'm always going to be there for them. Cuddles, books, sob stories, whatever - I'm there on their level just waiting for them. I've also been trying to have special one-on-one time with each of them pretty regularly, if not every day.
Today was special Mommy/Naomi time all morning. The boys went to a birthday party with Daddy while Naomi and I stayed home.
First we played with our new Pop Beads. We love these things! Even the boys have fun with them, but it was a special treat to get to play all girly with them. By the end Naomi and I each had several necklaces and bracelets.
Then we played a couple of rousing rounds of Guess Who. You can see that Naomi was about to whoop me on this round.
Then Naomi made herself some lunch and, to make it more special, was allowed to eat her lunch in the family room while watching TV.
The boys have another birthday party to go to next Saturday and I already made plans for Naomi to have a playdate during that time so that she won't feel left out. But at the end of our special time together she said, "I wish we could just do this again next week instead." I think by next week she'll have changed her mind, but it was good to hear that she had a good time.
And it was really good for me to feel like an actual productive adult for the morning. Really I felt more like the fun Aunt than the Mommy, but that's a good feeling too!
Today was special Mommy/Naomi time all morning. The boys went to a birthday party with Daddy while Naomi and I stayed home.
First we played with our new Pop Beads. We love these things! Even the boys have fun with them, but it was a special treat to get to play all girly with them. By the end Naomi and I each had several necklaces and bracelets.
Then we played a couple of rousing rounds of Guess Who. You can see that Naomi was about to whoop me on this round.
Then Naomi made herself some lunch and, to make it more special, was allowed to eat her lunch in the family room while watching TV.
The boys have another birthday party to go to next Saturday and I already made plans for Naomi to have a playdate during that time so that she won't feel left out. But at the end of our special time together she said, "I wish we could just do this again next week instead." I think by next week she'll have changed her mind, but it was good to hear that she had a good time. And it was really good for me to feel like an actual productive adult for the morning. Really I felt more like the fun Aunt than the Mommy, but that's a good feeling too!
Here is a smattering of pictures from the last few months of me laying on the couch. I have a unique perspective, laying around all day.
I have the privilege of being the place where Isaiah prefers to throw his fits these days. In the picture below he is hiding under his blanket while screaming his head off about some injustice.
Here are Asher and Daddy showing off their matching plaid shorts. Asher was so proud.
Here's Isaiah goofing off on the nice living room furniture. He was soon thereafter scolded.
Here I am supervising Naomi and Asher playing computer games.
Here's Asher giving Samuel a hug. Asher loves to hug and kiss my tummy/Samuel. First he asks where Samuel is, then when I point to my belly he squishes Samuel and I in a hug and then gently kisses my belly. Then he always asks if Samuel hugged and kissed him back. And I always say yes.
In this shot Asher and Isaiah are seeking sanctuary from Nanny Amy who is trying to put them down for their naps.
Here's Isaiah stealing my headphones and jamming out to my tunes (or was it the Book of Mormon?).
Can you tell from these pics who my most frequent visitor on the couch is? Definitely Isaiah. He comes in to cuddle me or tell me something quite often. And I am so OK with that.
I have the privilege of being the place where Isaiah prefers to throw his fits these days. In the picture below he is hiding under his blanket while screaming his head off about some injustice.
Here are Asher and Daddy showing off their matching plaid shorts. Asher was so proud.
Here's Isaiah goofing off on the nice living room furniture. He was soon thereafter scolded.
Here I am supervising Naomi and Asher playing computer games.
Here's Asher giving Samuel a hug. Asher loves to hug and kiss my tummy/Samuel. First he asks where Samuel is, then when I point to my belly he squishes Samuel and I in a hug and then gently kisses my belly. Then he always asks if Samuel hugged and kissed him back. And I always say yes.
In this shot Asher and Isaiah are seeking sanctuary from Nanny Amy who is trying to put them down for their naps.
Here's Isaiah stealing my headphones and jamming out to my tunes (or was it the Book of Mormon?).
Can you tell from these pics who my most frequent visitor on the couch is? Definitely Isaiah. He comes in to cuddle me or tell me something quite often. And I am so OK with that.I had another check-up today at the hospital. They did an ultrasound to check on my cervix and measure the baby. The biggest discoveries were that 1) My cervix is the same as my last appointment, two weeks ago - very good news 2) Samuel is measuring close to the 80th% leg-length wise, but is in the 50th% for all his other measurements - he is looking like he's going to be a tall boy, and 3) Samuel has his head buried next to my right hip bone with his back facing upwards - which is a crazy position and hopefully he won't turn breech (but that does explain why my hip has been killing me). It was a good visit and, as always, I feel better after confirming that everything is still good. I especially feel better after mentioning to my doctor that a medication he put me on a couple of weeks ago is making me sick and him immediately responding, "Well, it's not worth it then. Try taking it every other day and if that's still making you sick, just stop taking it." What a great answer! I'm sure I've mentioned it before, but having a doctor who I trust, and who trusts me, makes all the difference. I can't imagine how hard this would be if I didn't feel so supported by my dear Dr. Tashman.
Isaiah 40:11
He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young.
He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young.
I really do like the summer, I really do. But at the same time I would like it a lot more if I spent three months in Lake Tahoe or at the ocean. About this time every summer I'm starting to feel ready for the structure and busyness of fall. That's my excuse for not blogging this time... anyway here are some pictures, mostly for my mom!
We had a pretty low key Fourth of July, but there were sparklers, always sparklers.
Roger had a business trip in Cincinnati and invited us to come along. We went to the Children's Museum while he was working. Luke is obsessed with lawn mowers. He was so pleased to see they had these in a toddler area of the museum. He tried to push it up the slide. I was a little sad to put a stop to it because I would have liked to see how far he could have gone.
We actually stayed in Covington, KY which is right across the Ohio River from Cincinnati. This huge bell was in the nearby town of Newport. I couldn't really figure it out, but it was huge so I took a picture. It was called the Peace Bell, so there you go...
In June we had to make this rather unfortunate upgrade. Our fridge just stopped working, so we had to replace it. We knew we wanted a new fridge, but I didn't want one right now. There's still the business of the furnace that we need to replace, but I guess your food has to stay cold too.
Before
After. We got this bad boy at the Sears Outlet. It's all dented, but who cares? The price was right and we have kids that dent stuff, it fits right in.
One of the problems I've been having lately is trying to convince myself to get out of bed in the morning. Because, really, why should I? Richard get the kids up and feeds them breakfast around 7. By 8 Nanny Amy is here and she dresses the kids and pretty much takes over things. I mostly just try to stay out of the way when she's here so that it's clear she's the authority figure. So, I repeat, why should I get out of bed? Ever? I am, after all, on bed rest. But staying in bed all day is pretty depressing. So I usually convince myself to get out of bed eventually (like around 10am). It's not that I can sleep that long - although I often wish I could - I read or watch a show on my computer.
A couple of days ago though, I was having a particularly emotionally rough day and I just really couldn't convince myself to get up. I lay there wishing I could just take two sleeping pills and wake up in 24 hours. Or better yet, I daydreamed, couldn't I just sleep for about two months until this is all over? ...Anyway, downward spiral aside, I finally convinced myself to get up and work on this project:
I'm embroidering the scripture that inspired us to name this baby Samuel. When I'm done I'll leave it in the embroidery hoop and hang it up in his room. Richard helped me pick a font on the computer and carefully trace the letters on with my disappearing-ink fabric pen. It's going slowly because I am doing very small, careful stitches. But I've got all the time in the world!
A couple of days ago though, I was having a particularly emotionally rough day and I just really couldn't convince myself to get up. I lay there wishing I could just take two sleeping pills and wake up in 24 hours. Or better yet, I daydreamed, couldn't I just sleep for about two months until this is all over? ...Anyway, downward spiral aside, I finally convinced myself to get up and work on this project:
I'm embroidering the scripture that inspired us to name this baby Samuel. When I'm done I'll leave it in the embroidery hoop and hang it up in his room. Richard helped me pick a font on the computer and carefully trace the letters on with my disappearing-ink fabric pen. It's going slowly because I am doing very small, careful stitches. But I've got all the time in the world!He's getting bigger! It's still amazing to me how much this guy is sticking straight out in front. I guess he doesn't have much chance to spread out to the sides since I'm always laying on my side.
What’s in a name?
I’ve received several messages from worried fans because we haven’t written for a while. Fear not. The Wife has been having explosive diarrhea and I’ve been cleaning the house. It’s all a big joke until someone eats a bunch of bonbons.
I think that will get me in a lot of trouble, but it has been a while since the pot has been stirred publicly. We have been busy buying a house and I have changed jobs, but I think the madness will be ending soon. Plus, I have a long list of posts based on these experiences. The Wife even said she might write again, but we’ve heard that before.
I was thinking the other day about how creepy the name Bert is. In fact, almost any name including the name Bert is creepy. Think about it. When was the last time you met a cool Bert? Look at the list below and tell me one name that isn’t likely to be found on some sort of perpetrator list. Perhaps it’s because a lot of these names sound like ‘pervert’. I’ve actually ranked these in order of creepiness and likelihood of showing up on some type of watch list. Feel free to add names or defend your own ‘Bert’.
-Herbert (my grandfather’s middle name and #1 creepy Bert variation)
-Hubert
-Albert
-Bertram
-Norbert
-Egbert
-Bert
-Engelbert
-Lambert
-Dilbert
-Bertrand
-Wilbert
-Gilbert
I would like to note two things. First, Robert is the only possible exception to this rule. Second, Bertha should not be forgotten. Although you might not find this name on a perpetrator list, you should definitely avoid this person at all costs if you are considering a romantic relationship.
What does this have to do with wife advice? Not much, but it’s certainly information people need to be aware of. I’m just thankful there is a forum like this to notify the public.
A short hiatus from diapers, that is.
Today Nanny Amy started potty training Isaiah! This was an interesting day since Amy's own child is only 9 months old, so she's never potty trained before. But she said she was up for the task (and I promised her a bonus at the end of the week for the extra drama). The day started with a special Daddy/Isaiah trip to Target where Isaiah picked out Thomas the Tank Engine underwear and M&Ms for a reward. Then they came home and Isaiah was thrilled to just put it right on. I so wish I had pictures, but sadly my camera batteries are dead. Isaiah was so proud of his new Thomas underwear that he walked around wagging his toosh and showing us all. For the beginning of potty training I give the kid a treat for each time they even attempt to "put pee in the toilet" by sitting on the throne. So Isaiah had at least 3 servings of 5 M&Ms each before 11am. Then he had an accident - which wasn't really surprising since he had yet to successfully pee in the toilet in his life. But the next time that Amy coerced him to sit on the toilet he had success!! His first morning in big-boy underwear and the total was one accident to one success. Not too shabby!
To keep up with the trend, we also let Asher wear his underwear during nap time for the first time. He's been pretty much potty trained for a year now, but during nap time I've always put a diaper on him and locked him in his room (oops, if you're with CPS I just mean "locked" in a metaphorical sense. If you're not with CPS but rather a Mom dealing with a crazy kid, I highly recommend switching the lock on your kids door knob so that it locks from the outside.) Anyway, Asher also successfully made it through nap time with clean and dry underwear.
It's just all about poop, pee and underwear around here right now.
Today Nanny Amy started potty training Isaiah! This was an interesting day since Amy's own child is only 9 months old, so she's never potty trained before. But she said she was up for the task (and I promised her a bonus at the end of the week for the extra drama). The day started with a special Daddy/Isaiah trip to Target where Isaiah picked out Thomas the Tank Engine underwear and M&Ms for a reward. Then they came home and Isaiah was thrilled to just put it right on. I so wish I had pictures, but sadly my camera batteries are dead. Isaiah was so proud of his new Thomas underwear that he walked around wagging his toosh and showing us all. For the beginning of potty training I give the kid a treat for each time they even attempt to "put pee in the toilet" by sitting on the throne. So Isaiah had at least 3 servings of 5 M&Ms each before 11am. Then he had an accident - which wasn't really surprising since he had yet to successfully pee in the toilet in his life. But the next time that Amy coerced him to sit on the toilet he had success!! His first morning in big-boy underwear and the total was one accident to one success. Not too shabby!
To keep up with the trend, we also let Asher wear his underwear during nap time for the first time. He's been pretty much potty trained for a year now, but during nap time I've always put a diaper on him and locked him in his room (oops, if you're with CPS I just mean "locked" in a metaphorical sense. If you're not with CPS but rather a Mom dealing with a crazy kid, I highly recommend switching the lock on your kids door knob so that it locks from the outside.) Anyway, Asher also successfully made it through nap time with clean and dry underwear.
It's just all about poop, pee and underwear around here right now.
I'm supposed to be telling myself that I'm being a good Mom by laying around all day, right? I'm taking care of Samuel by not moving as much as possible.
But then there are times that my other children need me to do something that would require me getting up or moving or whatever. And then I feel like a bad Mom for not being able to do that thing.
So sometimes I cheat. For example, I just got up and changed Isaiah's diaper because Richard isn't here at the moment and I couldn't stand the idea of Isaiah being poopy for another second. I was being a good Mom.
But then when I got up from the floor, I had a contraction. And felt like a bad Mom. Because apparently that wasn't good for Samuel.
*sigh*
But then there are times that my other children need me to do something that would require me getting up or moving or whatever. And then I feel like a bad Mom for not being able to do that thing.
So sometimes I cheat. For example, I just got up and changed Isaiah's diaper because Richard isn't here at the moment and I couldn't stand the idea of Isaiah being poopy for another second. I was being a good Mom.
But then when I got up from the floor, I had a contraction. And felt like a bad Mom. Because apparently that wasn't good for Samuel.
*sigh*
A few months ago we headed to our backyard for our own photoshoot to get some updated family pics. They turned out pretty well for the camera being on a timer. We missed having everyone home (I'm still hoping for that picture someday :) So, it's just the 7 of us at home right now. Just as we finished we felt rain drops. Good timing!
I am at 30 weeks now. 40 weeks is full-term (although, actually, I think anything after 38 weeks is still considered full-term). So, with that 38 weeks in mind as my goal, I realized that I am probably half way through this situation. I went on bed rest at 22 weeks - so 8 weeks down. And if full-term is 38 weeks - 8 weeks to go.
I'm not sure how I feel about that. Sometimes I feel like, "Alright! I just have to do what I've already done one more time - and this is all done!". However, there are plenty of other times when it's a little more like, "I have to do what I've already done again?" Also, it's starting to sink in that when this is all done, I'm nowhere near done. After this I have to deal with a newborn. While I have a body that hasn't worked at all in four months. ... I kinda feel like I need a break inbetween this situation and the next. Don't I deserve a break? Then I feel terrible for feeling like that because the only way I'm getting a break inbetween is if this baby ends up having to stay in the hospital for a while. ... And I really don't want that.
Anyway, as you can see, I've still got plenty of worries on my mind. I did just have a check up today and everything still looks fine. I got to see my cute little baby Samuel again and this time we could even see hair on his head and got a great look at his chubby little cheeks.
It's all good. And it kinda totally sucks, too.
(Stay tuned for some catch up posts with pics from my Moms visit, the 4th of July, and painting Naomi/Samuel's room.)
I'm not sure how I feel about that. Sometimes I feel like, "Alright! I just have to do what I've already done one more time - and this is all done!". However, there are plenty of other times when it's a little more like, "I have to do what I've already done again?" Also, it's starting to sink in that when this is all done, I'm nowhere near done. After this I have to deal with a newborn. While I have a body that hasn't worked at all in four months. ... I kinda feel like I need a break inbetween this situation and the next. Don't I deserve a break? Then I feel terrible for feeling like that because the only way I'm getting a break inbetween is if this baby ends up having to stay in the hospital for a while. ... And I really don't want that.
Anyway, as you can see, I've still got plenty of worries on my mind. I did just have a check up today and everything still looks fine. I got to see my cute little baby Samuel again and this time we could even see hair on his head and got a great look at his chubby little cheeks.
It's all good. And it kinda totally sucks, too.
(Stay tuned for some catch up posts with pics from my Moms visit, the 4th of July, and painting Naomi/Samuel's room.)
Grandma A came to visit over the long 4th of July weekend and really perked us all up. It was fun to have her here, as always, but I think this time the kids really enjoyed the special pampering that comes with a Grandma visit. And it was a great pick-me-up for me, too, since I love my Mama so much.
She helped with so much while she was here and did a ton of crafts and activities with the kids. One thing they really enjoyed was making fruit kabobs for our July 4th meal.
Grandma made everything so cute and festive for us.
And she and Richard took the kids to the fireworks that night. She even bought matchy outfits for the kids (our mistake was in letting them eat dinner in their cute outfits - Asher made a mess of his and had to change before the photo op.)
Here are some pics of cute kids waiting for the fireworks.
The fireworks were a hit. Everybody loved them. However, the getting home at 11pm part was a little rough. Apparently each of the kids had a meltdown on the way home for various reasons.
Overall, I think it was a memorable day for the kids.
She helped with so much while she was here and did a ton of crafts and activities with the kids. One thing they really enjoyed was making fruit kabobs for our July 4th meal.
Grandma made everything so cute and festive for us.
And she and Richard took the kids to the fireworks that night. She even bought matchy outfits for the kids (our mistake was in letting them eat dinner in their cute outfits - Asher made a mess of his and had to change before the photo op.)
Here are some pics of cute kids waiting for the fireworks.
The fireworks were a hit. Everybody loved them. However, the getting home at 11pm part was a little rough. Apparently each of the kids had a meltdown on the way home for various reasons.Overall, I think it was a memorable day for the kids.
Check out my life's theme song these days. How did Alicia Keys know?
I like to shop. But I can't do that much these days. Except online. The good part about shopping online is that it takes more commitment to buy something. At least for me, it seems more complicated online than just handing a credit card to a nice clerk in a store. So it slows down my shopping.
Which is good. Because I have quite a few things that I want! All baby-related, of course. Here's my current To-Get list.
Lucky me, I get to buy a new infant car seat for this baby! (Car seats expire, in general, after 6 years.) I'm in love with this great argyle pattern from Graco.
I'm also very excited to get a car seat "canopy". (I love the fabric on this one pictured) I've always just thrown a blanket over the top of my car seat to give my baby some dark or privacy or warmth, but these ones that strap or tie on are great! Genius! (And, as a bonus, I think I've convinced my Mom or sister to make one for me!)
Then there's these nursing covers that actually have a wire in them of some sort so that poor baby isn't quite so closed in, I can see him while he's nursing, he can see me, fresh air circulates, and he can't just pull the blanket off my shoulder - keeping my more modest.
And I've never had a great wrap or sling or anything like that that really worked for me. I think these Moby Wraps might be just the answer. It's basically just a long piece of fabric that you use to literally tie your baby to your chest.
And, last but not least, I want a stroller frame. No more lugging around a huge stroller. If I had one of these I could just pull out this small thing and snap the car seat right into it. It's lighter, smaller, and easier than a whole huge stroller.
So, that's it. Just a few things, right? The only thing that's really necessary is the car seat. But hey, a girl can dream, right?
Which is good. Because I have quite a few things that I want! All baby-related, of course. Here's my current To-Get list.
Lucky me, I get to buy a new infant car seat for this baby! (Car seats expire, in general, after 6 years.) I'm in love with this great argyle pattern from Graco.
I'm also very excited to get a car seat "canopy". (I love the fabric on this one pictured) I've always just thrown a blanket over the top of my car seat to give my baby some dark or privacy or warmth, but these ones that strap or tie on are great! Genius! (And, as a bonus, I think I've convinced my Mom or sister to make one for me!)
Then there's these nursing covers that actually have a wire in them of some sort so that poor baby isn't quite so closed in, I can see him while he's nursing, he can see me, fresh air circulates, and he can't just pull the blanket off my shoulder - keeping my more modest. 
And I've never had a great wrap or sling or anything like that that really worked for me. I think these Moby Wraps might be just the answer. It's basically just a long piece of fabric that you use to literally tie your baby to your chest.
And, last but not least, I want a stroller frame. No more lugging around a huge stroller. If I had one of these I could just pull out this small thing and snap the car seat right into it. It's lighter, smaller, and easier than a whole huge stroller. 
So, that's it. Just a few things, right? The only thing that's really necessary is the car seat. But hey, a girl can dream, right?My baby is 4...what happened?! We celebrated this milestone last April (yes, I'm still behind in posts) by having 2 ponies come to our house. Natty had a few friends which made it even more special in her eyes. When the ponies first came, she didn't want to ride. In fact out of all her friends, she was the only one who was scared. But, after a while (and coaxing from Dad) she jumped on the saddle and realized there was nothing to be scared of after all. We continued the pony theme with a beautiful Cowgirl Dora cake that my very talented friend, Natalie made. Thank you to Madelaine, Dylan, Aiva, Sacia, Anna, and Aunt Trish for joining us that day. The only glitch in the day was that Tim was the camera guy and I forgot to change the camera settings back for him to use. So...many of the pictures didn't come out. But, we did get some great ones! Happy Birthday to our little Natty.
This year our Kids Day was a little different. With me pretty much out of the picture and Richard trying so hard to work full time and be Dad full time, there just wasn't much time for pampering the kids. Sure we gave the nanny a "Give the kids whatever they want" kind of speech, but that's just not the same. In the end, I think the kids felt loved, but maybe not quite as much as previous Kids Days.
Pretty much all I can do for the kids these days is give out plenty of cuddles. So we did a lot of that.
And Daddy bought the kids new pool toys. Nanny Amy played with the kids in the backyard.
Grandma Worth even stopped by (to clean the house - happy Kids Day to me!).
A friend dropped off this great big fruit platter for us and we let the kids have free reign of it with a side of Grandma-made banana bread.
And of course there was crazy dancing to loud music - a family favorite.
Later in the evening, Daddy took the kids to the mall for a ride on the carousel. I sent the camera with him with strict instructions to at least take one picture of each kid. ...But the camera stayed in the car instead of going into the mall. But, you know, taking three kids into a mall to ride a carousel is a tricky thing for a Dad to handle on his own at the end of a long day. So we'll cut him some slack this time.
Besides, in the end there were happy children. And that's what Kid's Day is really all about.
(As usual, I realize that there are very few pictures of Asher. He is just really not into the whole "stand still and say cheese" thing.)
Pretty much all I can do for the kids these days is give out plenty of cuddles. So we did a lot of that.
And Daddy bought the kids new pool toys. Nanny Amy played with the kids in the backyard.
Grandma Worth even stopped by (to clean the house - happy Kids Day to me!).
A friend dropped off this great big fruit platter for us and we let the kids have free reign of it with a side of Grandma-made banana bread.
And of course there was crazy dancing to loud music - a family favorite.
Later in the evening, Daddy took the kids to the mall for a ride on the carousel. I sent the camera with him with strict instructions to at least take one picture of each kid. ...But the camera stayed in the car instead of going into the mall. But, you know, taking three kids into a mall to ride a carousel is a tricky thing for a Dad to handle on his own at the end of a long day. So we'll cut him some slack this time.Besides, in the end there were happy children. And that's what Kid's Day is really all about.
(As usual, I realize that there are very few pictures of Asher. He is just really not into the whole "stand still and say cheese" thing.)
Forgive the unflattering shot of my armpit and a scowl on my face, but this was the best shot I could get of my little bump. Hey, at least it finally is a discernible bump! And isn't my shirt with the little footprints on it just adorable? It makes me happy. I love Etsy!
I realize I haven't said much about how Isaiah is doing, speech-wise, lately. He is making awesome leaps and bounds forward! His speech therapy ended a couple of weeks ago and he won't be doing any of that during the summer. But he seems to be still soaking up language all on his own. The other day he said "Asher"! We haven't even been working on that one because the speech therapist told us it was basically impossible for him at this point. Isaiah has just been calling Asher "Ah". But, to my amazement, he just casually threw an "Asher" (well, really an "Ashew" but close enough!) into conversation the other day. And today he said "fish"! He has figured out and mastered the "sh" sound all by himself! And he often self-corrects. He'll say "I wah da." and then immediately pause and repeat "I wanT daT" just like his speech therapist would have made him do it.
Sometimes he is still totally incomprehensible, but usually only when he's in a rush or super excited about something. And he certainly isn't caught up with kids his age yet. But he has shown such strength and eagerness to learn and do it correctly that I really have every hope that he will have caught up with his peers before they can stick him with some awful nickname or stereotype.
What a blessing that this has turned out so well so far. ...Man. Our family really is blessed. Repeatedly.
Sometimes he is still totally incomprehensible, but usually only when he's in a rush or super excited about something. And he certainly isn't caught up with kids his age yet. But he has shown such strength and eagerness to learn and do it correctly that I really have every hope that he will have caught up with his peers before they can stick him with some awful nickname or stereotype.
What a blessing that this has turned out so well so far. ...Man. Our family really is blessed. Repeatedly.
When I have no news, that's good news, right? Hence my absence in blogging. Here's some catch-up:
I made it to my third trimester! Samuel is now at 27 weeks. According to one website I was reading, he now has an 85% chance of survival where he to be born right now. While those odds are still not "good enough", they are a huge relief. I have another check up at the doctor Thursday and I fully expect nothing but clear skies to continue. Wa-hoo!
Naomi is all done with school. My big girl is no longer a kindergartner. Summer has kicked itself off here with mid-90's sunshiney days, so we got out the inflatable backyard pool. Amy, the nanny, has had the kids out there the last two days for hours.
Speaking of the nanny, Amy - she is great. We are loving her and feel oh so blessed to have found her. She is great with the kids and handles most situations just the way I would. Naomi and Asher warmed right up to her. Isaiah is still working on it, but at least he doesn't scream when she so much as speaks to him anymore.
My sister-in-law, and great friend, Stacy, came to spend last week with us. The plan was for her to help me with implementing systems, but she ended up spending much of her time helping with the kids. Each of the kids took turns having a quick-but-ugly stomach bug last week and we didn't feel like we could have Amy over (she brings her 8 month old son with her each day) while they were sick. Stacy was a lifesaver. For the kids, for the house, and for me. I just love having her around. Plus, she did get a TON done for me. She helped me unbury the end of the counter (paper, paper, paper) and my desk, made 9 freezer meals, cooked most of Father's Day dinner, let Richard go see two movies and go out to dinner with his brother on Saturday, cleaned the house, did the dishes, cooked delicious meals for the family, played happily with the kids, took Naomi to get a haircut, painted a cabinet that I had half painted in my bathroom makeover from months ago, and cheered my soul immensely. She is a superwoman in every sense of the word. Naomi and Asher sobbed for half an hour when she left. And I kinda felt like joining them.
I snuck out of the house and went to my book club last week. It was so great to be out that I stayed out until after 10! I'm such a rebel.
Stay tuned for more exciting drama from what has got to be the most boring part of my life!
I made it to my third trimester! Samuel is now at 27 weeks. According to one website I was reading, he now has an 85% chance of survival where he to be born right now. While those odds are still not "good enough", they are a huge relief. I have another check up at the doctor Thursday and I fully expect nothing but clear skies to continue. Wa-hoo!
Naomi is all done with school. My big girl is no longer a kindergartner. Summer has kicked itself off here with mid-90's sunshiney days, so we got out the inflatable backyard pool. Amy, the nanny, has had the kids out there the last two days for hours.
Speaking of the nanny, Amy - she is great. We are loving her and feel oh so blessed to have found her. She is great with the kids and handles most situations just the way I would. Naomi and Asher warmed right up to her. Isaiah is still working on it, but at least he doesn't scream when she so much as speaks to him anymore.
My sister-in-law, and great friend, Stacy, came to spend last week with us. The plan was for her to help me with implementing systems, but she ended up spending much of her time helping with the kids. Each of the kids took turns having a quick-but-ugly stomach bug last week and we didn't feel like we could have Amy over (she brings her 8 month old son with her each day) while they were sick. Stacy was a lifesaver. For the kids, for the house, and for me. I just love having her around. Plus, she did get a TON done for me. She helped me unbury the end of the counter (paper, paper, paper) and my desk, made 9 freezer meals, cooked most of Father's Day dinner, let Richard go see two movies and go out to dinner with his brother on Saturday, cleaned the house, did the dishes, cooked delicious meals for the family, played happily with the kids, took Naomi to get a haircut, painted a cabinet that I had half painted in my bathroom makeover from months ago, and cheered my soul immensely. She is a superwoman in every sense of the word. Naomi and Asher sobbed for half an hour when she left. And I kinda felt like joining them.
I snuck out of the house and went to my book club last week. It was so great to be out that I stayed out until after 10! I'm such a rebel.
Stay tuned for more exciting drama from what has got to be the most boring part of my life!
Here's my unintentional once a month posting and it's chock full of goodness.
May was one of the busiest months we've had. Ashby was playing soccer and softball, Avery was playing t-ball and having dance class once a week. Roger was working a lot and I went to Utah for a week. There are only a few pictures, but trust me we had a good month.
June brought the end of school (YIPEE!!!). Summer has already been eventful and fun. We look forward to more sleeping in, playing outside and doing other summery things.
Look at my all way cooler than me siblings. Aren't they all so beautiful and handsome. I went to Utah for a week because my sister Katie (far right) had some surgery and needed help with her rugrats. I'm not going to lie to you, it was so fun to be away for a little while. Roger took the week off stay home with our kids. Katie and I had so much fun and I got a good dose of my other sisters and brother too.
Avery participated in her year end dance recital. And look Kevin, Kelly and Ethan were there too. We were very glad to be done with dance class and the recital was a great note to end on.
Try not to shudder in horror, but this, people, is my bathroom. Yes it's carpeted, why? Who knows. Note the red towel near the toilet. We had a leaking toilet a few months back and that section of the carpet had to go. I mean really you can only go up from here right? Did you note that I said Kevin and Kelly were here? They never get to come with out being put to work.
This is what they accomplished. Isn't is so great you could cry? Maybe that's just me. There is more to do in this bathroom, but if nothing else got remodeled, I would still be happy. I feel so much joy every time I go in there, I can hardly stand it. Did you know tile could make a person so happy?
This was our little cabin and we also had a tent pad. The bathrooms were just off and to the right, overall it couldn't have worked out better.
Luke ate sand and drank the lake water.
See that canoe? It's holding Kevin, Ashby, Avery and Roger. I think they had fun and no one fell in.
I hope there's much more of this this summer. Being outside and sharing a snack, is there anything better?
Richard and my sister Ruth just took the kids to the pool for the afternoon. At first I was feeling happy to be left alone - free reign of the TV and all - but then I noticed that the dishes weren't done. And laundry needs to be done. And the bathroom has dirt all over it from the kids coming in from outside and being sent straight to the bathroom to wash up. And it all started bugging me. I just want to get up and clean! Cleaning when the house is empty is almost pleasant sometimes. And I know that if I leave all these things alone, Ruth will come home and do them all for us. And that just makes me want to get up and do them more because Ruth has done a LOT for our family lately. Grrr. It's frustrating. Frustrating in a way that I'm not sure anybody can understand unless they've been there. Some day I'll look back on this post and think, "Man, if Ruth came over right now I sure wouldn't complain about her doing my laundry and cleaning my house while I lay around!" But after four weeks of being totally dependent on others, this is really tiresome.
I've come to realize that part of my frustration comes from feeling like things are out of control. Not just out of MY control - but not controlled at all. The laundry gets done when somebody comes over to help, but nobody is constantly aware of the laundry needs. The dishes get done daily, but the big pots pile up because nobody does a seriously thorough deep cleaning. Things are getting done, but they're not really "under control". Ya know? So Richard and I had a long talk about those kinds of things. Because I've been assuming that he would slowly take over being in control of those things. And he's been assuming that I'm still in control of them because they are getting done when people come over. What he and I concluded is that we need new systems. New systems that are just set so regularly that they never seem to be out of control. Like Monday is vacuuming, Tuesday is laundry, Wednesday is deep cleaning the kitchen, etc. And that if we have that kind of a system, even though I'm not the one doing any of it, I can still feel in control by making sure that thing gets done that day - whether that means telling Richard to do it or the random person who comes by to help. We really hope this will help. This coming week my sister-in-law, Stacy, is coming for a week. She and I will work on getting that system, and several others, working.
With all this planning and system-implementing going on, I am starting to feel a little better about life. But I still wish I could just get up and do things the way I usually would!
I've come to realize that part of my frustration comes from feeling like things are out of control. Not just out of MY control - but not controlled at all. The laundry gets done when somebody comes over to help, but nobody is constantly aware of the laundry needs. The dishes get done daily, but the big pots pile up because nobody does a seriously thorough deep cleaning. Things are getting done, but they're not really "under control". Ya know? So Richard and I had a long talk about those kinds of things. Because I've been assuming that he would slowly take over being in control of those things. And he's been assuming that I'm still in control of them because they are getting done when people come over. What he and I concluded is that we need new systems. New systems that are just set so regularly that they never seem to be out of control. Like Monday is vacuuming, Tuesday is laundry, Wednesday is deep cleaning the kitchen, etc. And that if we have that kind of a system, even though I'm not the one doing any of it, I can still feel in control by making sure that thing gets done that day - whether that means telling Richard to do it or the random person who comes by to help. We really hope this will help. This coming week my sister-in-law, Stacy, is coming for a week. She and I will work on getting that system, and several others, working.
With all this planning and system-implementing going on, I am starting to feel a little better about life. But I still wish I could just get up and do things the way I usually would!
My ears and hips and head have gotten over their initial soreness from laying around all day. These days, instead of having a headache when I lay down too long, I get a headache when I stand up.
Guilt. I feel tons of guilt. Every time somebody cries and I can't help at all. Every time Richard is having one of those (common with three kids) moments when he's overwhelmed by multiple needs from multiple children all at once. Every time something cute is going on in the other room and all I can do is lay here and listen. Every time there's a mess I can't clean up. Every time somebody is here helping in whatever sweet way they can. Every time someone calls and mentions they've been thinking/worrying about me. Pretty much all the time.
Worry. I worry about Samuel, of course. And how scary going into labor will be this time - whenever it happens. And what if something else goes wrong before I go into labor? I worry about Isaiah because he's the one who's handling this whole situation the worst. I worry for the nanny because Isaiah is such a basket case right now. I worry about blood clots in my legs because I don't move enough. I worry about how flabby and weak I'm going to be when I eventually get off bedrest. Pretty much about everything. There's not much else to do, ya know? Not much to keep my mind off these things.
Boring. I don't think I need to elaborate much there.
Lonely. It's weird that I haven't talked to any random people. Is it crazy that I miss seeing people I don't even know at the grocery store or Target or whatever? I guess maybe isolated is the right word.
I'd be lying if I didn't admit that sometimes it's nice. But only for a fleeting second here or there.
Weird. Weird to think that I haven't so much as walked into the kitchen in weeks. Or switched any laundry. Or tucked any children into bed. I feel a bit like I'm not myself since I haven't done any of those things. Those things really identify me as me at this stage in my life.
But, I am still taking care of a baby. I'm just doing it by laying around all day. I'm still me. I'm just me, horizontally!
Guilt. I feel tons of guilt. Every time somebody cries and I can't help at all. Every time Richard is having one of those (common with three kids) moments when he's overwhelmed by multiple needs from multiple children all at once. Every time something cute is going on in the other room and all I can do is lay here and listen. Every time there's a mess I can't clean up. Every time somebody is here helping in whatever sweet way they can. Every time someone calls and mentions they've been thinking/worrying about me. Pretty much all the time.
Worry. I worry about Samuel, of course. And how scary going into labor will be this time - whenever it happens. And what if something else goes wrong before I go into labor? I worry about Isaiah because he's the one who's handling this whole situation the worst. I worry for the nanny because Isaiah is such a basket case right now. I worry about blood clots in my legs because I don't move enough. I worry about how flabby and weak I'm going to be when I eventually get off bedrest. Pretty much about everything. There's not much else to do, ya know? Not much to keep my mind off these things.
Boring. I don't think I need to elaborate much there.
Lonely. It's weird that I haven't talked to any random people. Is it crazy that I miss seeing people I don't even know at the grocery store or Target or whatever? I guess maybe isolated is the right word.
I'd be lying if I didn't admit that sometimes it's nice. But only for a fleeting second here or there.
Weird. Weird to think that I haven't so much as walked into the kitchen in weeks. Or switched any laundry. Or tucked any children into bed. I feel a bit like I'm not myself since I haven't done any of those things. Those things really identify me as me at this stage in my life.
But, I am still taking care of a baby. I'm just doing it by laying around all day. I'm still me. I'm just me, horizontally!
A slow weekend was just what these kids needed. After three weeks of being carted off to this or that house to do this or that every day, they were ready for some good old fashioned stayin' home. Richard went to a short conference out of town and my sister Ruth came over to help with me and the kids. It was a much needed break for Richard, and fun for the kids and I. Aunt Ruth is always a treat!
Here are Naomi and Isaiah playing a computer game after a long Sunday nap.
And everybody got in on a rousing game of Guess Who with Aunt Ruth.
With plenty of time left over for cuddles and snuggles galore.
These poor children really do need some stability in their lives. They are all crabby and whiny and confused. They're explosive! Our sweet Isaiah throws colossal tantrums multiple times a day. They all just want their lives back. ...And I can SO relate.
Here are Naomi and Isaiah playing a computer game after a long Sunday nap.
And everybody got in on a rousing game of Guess Who with Aunt Ruth.
With plenty of time left over for cuddles and snuggles galore.
These poor children really do need some stability in their lives. They are all crabby and whiny and confused. They're explosive! Our sweet Isaiah throws colossal tantrums multiple times a day. They all just want their lives back. ...And I can SO relate.I went back out into the wild world today for the first time in weeks. I had a check up with my Dr and an appointment with the Neonatologist. My doctor gave me that shot that helps the baby's lungs develop a little earlier than usual - just in case Baby Sammy makes his appearance on this Earth a little too early. Then we went over to the Neonatologist's. There they did another ultrasound and we learned that my cervix is nearly as thick as a normal one! Thicker than it was when I left the hospital!
Clearly what we're doing is working! In addition to surgery, a great doctor and strict bedrest, the prayers and faith of many have brought about this true miracle.
It's so nice to be able to mentally relax a little bit. I've been feeling guilty every time I stand up or move abruptly. I haven't so much as sneezed without wondering if I've just done some damage to my baby and his safe womb. I haven't showered without wondering if I could have done it faster and therefore been better for the baby. Relaxing a little bit really does feel nice.
So did leaving the house!
Keep up those prayers, please.
***********
We hired a nanny who will start this Monday. She's a family member of someone we know from church. She has a ton of nanny/au pair experience. We are excited that next week will bring a little more regularity to the kids schedule, and a little less depending on the kindness of our sweet friends. I know they're more than happy to help, but it's gonna take me years to pay all this service back into the universe.
Clearly what we're doing is working! In addition to surgery, a great doctor and strict bedrest, the prayers and faith of many have brought about this true miracle.
It's so nice to be able to mentally relax a little bit. I've been feeling guilty every time I stand up or move abruptly. I haven't so much as sneezed without wondering if I've just done some damage to my baby and his safe womb. I haven't showered without wondering if I could have done it faster and therefore been better for the baby. Relaxing a little bit really does feel nice.
So did leaving the house!
Keep up those prayers, please.
***********
We hired a nanny who will start this Monday. She's a family member of someone we know from church. She has a ton of nanny/au pair experience. We are excited that next week will bring a little more regularity to the kids schedule, and a little less depending on the kindness of our sweet friends. I know they're more than happy to help, but it's gonna take me years to pay all this service back into the universe.
There's just not much to blog these days. I lay around all day. I alternate between my left side and my right. Movies, TV and books. Potty breaks are my only excuse to stand up.
I realize that this blog is not entirely about me. I usually also blog about the kids and what's going on in the family. But it's harder to do that when I'm not really a part of any of it.
Yesterday the kids played with Grandma in the morning and then Richard took them to the pool in the afternoon. So I'm sure they had a fun Memorial Day - I just didn't witness any of it. So I have no cute stories to share.
I try to be involved with the kids as much as possible, even from my prone position. But it's very overwhelming to talk to three kids when you are lower than them. They crowd around and over me and I quickly feel claustrophobic and overwhelmed. I try to have one on one time with each kid each day. But even that usually ends with all three kids piled around me in chaos. It's good chaos for them, but it's ... a lot... for me.
I'm really not fond of this helpless, totally dependent, me, me, me state that I'm in. When I can see that Richard is overwhelmed or even just pinched for time, it's so hard not to just get up and help. Shouting orders from the couch only helps so much as far as "help" goes.
...As you can see, it's getting harder and harder to stay cheery. But I thought I might want to remember some of this. ... So that some day, when I look back on it, I can remember it with fondness.
There's not much fondness at the moment.
Edited later to add:
My mother in law, Margaret, just left such a lovely comment that I had add it to the text here so that you would all be sure to see it:
"I enjoy playing with your kids, since you can't. A great story from yesterday (Memorial day) and one which I will always remember and treasure. The kids came in from playing outside and I was going to vacuum in the family room-which they don't like due to the noise. They said "can we play outside?' "No" I said, "I just got you clean and dry" (we had been playing in the water table). They said, "we can't play in the family room- it will be too noisey. "Can we play in the front room ?" "No" I said "the front room is always 'off limits'" "Can we go see Mom?" "No" I said, "she is resting right now." "Can we play in the basement?" "No" I said "Your dad has his office in the basement and he is working right now."
They looked dejected, they were out of ideas and all of a sudden Naomi said "Let's go to my room, I will read you a story!" And off they all went as happy as can be!!! Hooray for kids who can problem solve and be pro-active. That Naomi is a trooper!"
So, see, they're still cute. I just don't know about it.
I realize that this blog is not entirely about me. I usually also blog about the kids and what's going on in the family. But it's harder to do that when I'm not really a part of any of it.
Yesterday the kids played with Grandma in the morning and then Richard took them to the pool in the afternoon. So I'm sure they had a fun Memorial Day - I just didn't witness any of it. So I have no cute stories to share.
I try to be involved with the kids as much as possible, even from my prone position. But it's very overwhelming to talk to three kids when you are lower than them. They crowd around and over me and I quickly feel claustrophobic and overwhelmed. I try to have one on one time with each kid each day. But even that usually ends with all three kids piled around me in chaos. It's good chaos for them, but it's ... a lot... for me.
I'm really not fond of this helpless, totally dependent, me, me, me state that I'm in. When I can see that Richard is overwhelmed or even just pinched for time, it's so hard not to just get up and help. Shouting orders from the couch only helps so much as far as "help" goes.
...As you can see, it's getting harder and harder to stay cheery. But I thought I might want to remember some of this. ... So that some day, when I look back on it, I can remember it with fondness.
There's not much fondness at the moment.
Edited later to add:
My mother in law, Margaret, just left such a lovely comment that I had add it to the text here so that you would all be sure to see it:
"I enjoy playing with your kids, since you can't. A great story from yesterday (Memorial day) and one which I will always remember and treasure. The kids came in from playing outside and I was going to vacuum in the family room-which they don't like due to the noise. They said "can we play outside?' "No" I said, "I just got you clean and dry" (we had been playing in the water table). They said, "we can't play in the family room- it will be too noisey. "Can we play in the front room ?" "No" I said "the front room is always 'off limits'" "Can we go see Mom?" "No" I said, "she is resting right now." "Can we play in the basement?" "No" I said "Your dad has his office in the basement and he is working right now."
They looked dejected, they were out of ideas and all of a sudden Naomi said "Let's go to my room, I will read you a story!" And off they all went as happy as can be!!! Hooray for kids who can problem solve and be pro-active. That Naomi is a trooper!"
So, see, they're still cute. I just don't know about it.
Samuel is, for the moment, safe in my belly.
Medical advances are helping to keep him there.
While he's there I'm able to be at home with my family.
Richard is working from home and able to help with the kids (and me) whenever needed.
The kids are growing closer and closer to their father, who they love so much.
So many people in our church are being so, so helpful.
Within 20 minutes of telling our Relief Society President about our situation, three weeks of babysitting had been lined up for my kids.
Dinners are now coming in twice a week.
All those dinners are coming from people who I have had the blessing to serve in their times of need. I feel that is a huge blessing - to have led a life (up til now) where I am able to serve others whenever needed.
A friend stopped by today just to clean up whatever little thing I needed her to do. I lay on the couch ordering her around like the worst kind of boss. And she felt blessed. And I felt awful, and so blessed at the same time.
Did I mention that baby Samuel is safely inside me still? Can there be any bigger blessing than being able to bring a wonderful little soul into this world?
So if you call me and ask how I'm doing, and I rattle off a list of complaints a mile long about my ears and hips hurting from laying so long, and how bored I am, and how sad Isaiah is that I can't play with him, etc, etc, etc, please know that I really am incredibly thankful to have those things to complain about. And then call me. Cuz I am BORED. And my hips hurt. ...
Medical advances are helping to keep him there.
While he's there I'm able to be at home with my family.
Richard is working from home and able to help with the kids (and me) whenever needed.
The kids are growing closer and closer to their father, who they love so much.
So many people in our church are being so, so helpful.
Within 20 minutes of telling our Relief Society President about our situation, three weeks of babysitting had been lined up for my kids.
Dinners are now coming in twice a week.
All those dinners are coming from people who I have had the blessing to serve in their times of need. I feel that is a huge blessing - to have led a life (up til now) where I am able to serve others whenever needed.
A friend stopped by today just to clean up whatever little thing I needed her to do. I lay on the couch ordering her around like the worst kind of boss. And she felt blessed. And I felt awful, and so blessed at the same time.
Did I mention that baby Samuel is safely inside me still? Can there be any bigger blessing than being able to bring a wonderful little soul into this world?
So if you call me and ask how I'm doing, and I rattle off a list of complaints a mile long about my ears and hips hurting from laying so long, and how bored I am, and how sad Isaiah is that I can't play with him, etc, etc, etc, please know that I really am incredibly thankful to have those things to complain about. And then call me. Cuz I am BORED. And my hips hurt. ...
Ok, so things are getting a little out of order...oops! But, important to document nonetheless! Easter 2010. Tim took this beautiful shot of the Christus and Easter lillies that sat in our front entryway. We are so grateful for the ressurection of our Savior. What a blessing to know he died for all of us, he was resurrected to show us the way and gave us all the opportunity to live with our Heavenly Father again.
We have church at 1pm this year, which gives us a little time to relax before the morning rush to church. We did a little easter egg hunting this morning and had time to enjoy what the Easter Armadillo, bunny, pig, lamb or whatever it was this year brought to fill our baskets!
Ready for action! Get ready, get set...go find those eggs!
Did I ever say how grateful I am to my kids who are usually willing to pitch in and help out! After a fabulous Easter dinner, everyone helped out with clean up. I think I even heard them whistling :) Happy Easter!
Avery: Life is really hard sometimes.
Me: That's true, but it's also really good sometimes too right?
Avery: Yeah, like especially on pay day.
Me: Yeah that is pretty great.
Avery: Because then you get money.
Me: I like it when we get money.
Avery: But life is really bad when you get in a tornado.
Me: ?????
Avery: That happened to me once.
Me: ???? (comprehension slowly coming)
Roger: She's talking about the game of Life.
She had me going for a while there. Turns out my five year old is not turning into a tiny philosopher, thank heavens!
Me: That's true, but it's also really good sometimes too right?
Avery: Yeah, like especially on pay day.
Me: Yeah that is pretty great.
Avery: Because then you get money.
Me: I like it when we get money.
Avery: But life is really bad when you get in a tornado.
Me: ?????
Avery: That happened to me once.
Me: ???? (comprehension slowly coming)
Roger: She's talking about the game of Life.
She had me going for a while there. Turns out my five year old is not turning into a tiny philosopher, thank heavens!
Audrey has been busy in April and May! She started practice on her Middle School Play, Willy Wonka and performed it last weekend! What a joy to watch her as an Oompa Loompa. Grandad and Grammy came up to see her also. It's always fun when they come to visit! 
In April she also had a choir concert where she performed her first solo during the same week she was student of the week. It was fun to see her name on the board at school!
Woo hoo! Go Audrey!
I'm gonna get a little more detailed here than some (men) may be comfortable with. So stop now if you don't want to know...
Yesterday (Friday, May 14) at about 5pm I noticed that I was spotting (bleeding) a little bit. I blew it off. But I noticed again an hour later and again the next time I went to the bathroom. Finally, by 9pm I was no longer able to blow it off as a fluke and I started freaking out. First I called my Dr. to see what he would say. He told me that it was probably fine, but that I should come in to the hospital to have it checked out anyway. So I called my sister Ruth, who left an art gallery in Washington DC, abandoning the friend she had taken with her, and came straight over. In the meantime a good friend came over so that Richard and I could go straight to the hospital.
After checking several things and listening to the baby's heart beat (he's still a major wiggler and kept moving away from the heart rate monitor), two hours later they sent me home. While I feel relieved that there is nothing major...
Being in the hospital for that long upside-down was certainly difficult but I tried not to linger on the difficulty because it's a price I'm willing to pay to have our baby be in our family here on earth.
So Tuesday evening I had the surgery and there were some risks, but everything went wonderfully. And by Thursday afternoon I was allowed to go home.
I am now on complete bed rest, flat at home on my couch. It looks like I will be on bed rest the rest of this pregnancy which hopefully will be a very long time. We are working on hiring some kind of nanny/helper and are feeling very blessed that in the meantime Richard is working from home and so many friends are helping us out. Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers and calls. We really do feel the blessings pouring in. This situation has turned into the very best of the worst case scenario.
{Thanks to my sister Angela for being my scribe for this post. Typing is very difficult when you're laying flat.}
Yesterday (Friday, May 14) at about 5pm I noticed that I was spotting (bleeding) a little bit. I blew it off. But I noticed again an hour later and again the next time I went to the bathroom. Finally, by 9pm I was no longer able to blow it off as a fluke and I started freaking out. First I called my Dr. to see what he would say. He told me that it was probably fine, but that I should come in to the hospital to have it checked out anyway. So I called my sister Ruth, who left an art gallery in Washington DC, abandoning the friend she had taken with her, and came straight over. In the meantime a good friend came over so that Richard and I could go straight to the hospital.
After checking several things and listening to the baby's heart beat (he's still a major wiggler and kept moving away from the heart rate monitor), two hours later they sent me home. While I feel relieved that there is nothing major...
~~~~~~~~~
I wrote the previous post last Saturday morning. I stood up from what I had typed above and passed out.
So then we knew, maybe there was something major and went straight back to the hospital. In the hospital they whisked me in to an ultrasound and discovered that my cervix was less than one centimeter thick, where normal would be 4cm. Upon this discovery they immediately put my head down and my feet up, letting gravity do its work. The hope was that taking the pressure off my cervix would help it thicken back up.
And so I stayed for five days, upside down, in the hospital. After 48 hours, they did another ultrasound and discovered that it was working--my cervix was thickening up and was already back to 3.5cm. So the plan from there was to do a little surgery that would basically tie my cervix closed and keep that baby inside longer.
On the Sunday after I checked in to the hospital, many family and friends were praying and fasting for us, and we felt the benefit of those prayers very much. We decided that this baby who we were praying so hard for needed a name. We had a couple of picks and after Richard and I separately thought it over and prayed about it during church hours, we decided this baby's name would be Samuel, after 1 Samuel 1:20, which says,
"she bare a son, and called his name Samuel, saying, Because I have asked him of the Lord."
Being in the hospital for that long upside-down was certainly difficult but I tried not to linger on the difficulty because it's a price I'm willing to pay to have our baby be in our family here on earth.
So Tuesday evening I had the surgery and there were some risks, but everything went wonderfully. And by Thursday afternoon I was allowed to go home.
I am now on complete bed rest, flat at home on my couch. It looks like I will be on bed rest the rest of this pregnancy which hopefully will be a very long time. We are working on hiring some kind of nanny/helper and are feeling very blessed that in the meantime Richard is working from home and so many friends are helping us out. Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers and calls. We really do feel the blessings pouring in. This situation has turned into the very best of the worst case scenario.
{Thanks to my sister Angela for being my scribe for this post. Typing is very difficult when you're laying flat.}
Shattered dreams
I had a dream.
A profound statement if you are trying to rid the world of racism, but a dangerous statement for a husband. This is especially dangerous if the dream includes a woman other than the husband’s wife.
Have any of you husbands out there been reprimanded for your dreams?
This little guy in my tummy must really be growing right now. He's sucking the energy out of me so much I can hardly move. And I've gained nearly 2 pounds in the last 2 days (which I'm blaming on his growth spurt, not the chocolate cake).
... I've been sitting here trying to figure out how to lengthen this post, but really that's all I've got. That's it. Baby's growing. I'm tired. The End.
... I've been sitting here trying to figure out how to lengthen this post, but really that's all I've got. That's it. Baby's growing. I'm tired. The End.
He's 3. My baby is 3! (Good thing another baby is on the way!) We went really low key for Isaiah's birthday this year. We took the kids to a bounce house place in the afternoon and met one of Isaiah's friends there. Then after an hour of bouncing, we all went back to our house for an oh-so-deluxe meal of Mac N Cheese and Taquitos. With a leftover-Mother's-Day-chocolate-cake chaser. But a good time was had by all - and that's the truly important part.
Isaiah said at the beginning of the day, "Asher NOT the birthday boy anymore. *I* the birthday boy!" (Really what he said was "Ah NOT be-dah bo an-mo. *I* be-dah bo!" But that's the real English translation.) Clearly he understood that this day was about him!
Isaiah loves the big slide at the bounce house place the most.
To make the leftover chocolate cake a little more special (and birthday-y) I put these sugar decorations on each slice. I thought it was totally lame, but the kids loved it. And that is some friggin' good chocolate cake, so nobody really cared what it looked like.
Presents were opened on the day of, but were mostly played with the next morning. Here Isaiah is enjoying his new "pu-pee" given to him by his Aunt Ruth.
And here he is (a little later in the day) riding his new horsey from Mom and Dad. He yells, "Gi-duh" (Isaiah translation: Giddy-up)
I surely do love that boy. He just so dang sweet. He has so much compassion and love of life. He reminds me of his Daddy in so many ways.
Isaiah said at the beginning of the day, "Asher NOT the birthday boy anymore. *I* the birthday boy!" (Really what he said was "Ah NOT be-dah bo an-mo. *I* be-dah bo!" But that's the real English translation.) Clearly he understood that this day was about him!
Isaiah loves the big slide at the bounce house place the most.
To make the leftover chocolate cake a little more special (and birthday-y) I put these sugar decorations on each slice. I thought it was totally lame, but the kids loved it. And that is some friggin' good chocolate cake, so nobody really cared what it looked like.
Presents were opened on the day of, but were mostly played with the next morning. Here Isaiah is enjoying his new "pu-pee" given to him by his Aunt Ruth.
And here he is (a little later in the day) riding his new horsey from Mom and Dad. He yells, "Gi-duh" (Isaiah translation: Giddy-up)
I surely do love that boy. He just so dang sweet. He has so much compassion and love of life. He reminds me of his Daddy in so many ways.
I see where people are coming from who say Mother's Day is a silly, commercialized holiday. But I also totally soak every bit of it up. Because there are plenty of thankless days in Motherhood. So why not honor the hard work of Mother's once in a while? And, yes, it's a little ironic that I want to be honored in my motherhood by having a day off motherhood. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I still want to relax.
Richard let me take some "time off" on Saturday to go get a haircut, do some shopping, and have lunch alone. While I was gone he and the kids bought me a lilac tree to plant in the yard! On Sunday Richard was super helpful and sweet to me. We went to dinner at his parent's house with Kevin and Kelly and Ruth. It was a lovely day.
I felt very honored and loved and appreciated. And that is the point.
Richard let me take some "time off" on Saturday to go get a haircut, do some shopping, and have lunch alone. While I was gone he and the kids bought me a lilac tree to plant in the yard! On Sunday Richard was super helpful and sweet to me. We went to dinner at his parent's house with Kevin and Kelly and Ruth. It was a lovely day.
I felt very honored and loved and appreciated. And that is the point.
Mother’s Day Wrap-Up
As usual, I just cleaned the house and made a delicious dinner for my wife (Tandoori chicken). I gave her the standard coupons for a free back rub, foot massage, etc. The kids and I made a Mother’s Day Family Feud game in PowerPoint. The first question was related to why we love mom. The second was related to what mom can work on in the next year so she can be a better mom. She didn’t seem to receive this too well and didn’t seem that excited about the day. I should add that all of the answers to both questions were provided by the kids.
I’m not sure, but I think I’m noticing a trend for most women. Is it just me or do most mom’s want a day off from being a mom on Mother’s Day?