One of the slimiest things I ever did as a kid was telling on my friend for hiding the eraser at school. It’s a known fact that you can’t rat your friend out. Luckily I wasn’t busted by my classmates, but I knew what I had done was wrong. I think almost all kids know this, and yet, for some reason they love telling on their fathers when they know dad has pushed the envelope just a little too far.
The other day I was showing my kids some funny videos on hulu and remembered one of my favorite videos. It’s from SNL and is a spoof of Yo Gabba Gabba. This episode is called the Tizzle Wizzle Show. I promise that you will laugh if you have seen Yo Gabba Gabba. I was watching this with my three kids ages 8-3 and quickly realized that I had made a mistake. Knives? Pills? A battle to the death? What was I thinking? I let the video end and hoped that they would forget about this because I knew the danger I just put myself in. Only my oldest son could understand that this was a parody. The other two were thoroughly confused. I ended the video session and dismissed the kids to other activities. Two days later my wife confronted me when I walked in from work. Here’s how the conversation played out:
Wife: (angrily) Why in the world did you let the kids watch that video? I told you not to show them that when you showed it to me. Donkey: (playing dumb) What video? (I already knew what had happened) Wife: Tommy told me all about it. Why did you do that? Donkey: Where is Tommy? (I pretended to be concerned, but I was looking for blood. My eyes darted across the room until I saw him smiling on the stairs peeking out from behind the wall. He was actually laughing at me.) Donkey: Oh. Sorry about that. Wife: (yells for a few minutes and then leaves) Donkey: Tommy! Why did you tell on me? I’m not going to show you any funny videos anymore. Wife: (yells from upstairs) Are you serious? What’s wrong with you? I heard that! Tommy: Yeah Daddy. What’s wrong with you? (smiles and runs away)
Laura Ingalls Wilder was one of my first favorite artists. I still have the whole set of "Little House on the Prairie" books as a set. They were given to me as a Christmas present when I was around 8 I would guess. (I'm guessing about the age, I know it was a Christmas present because I remember finding them before Christmas in my mother's closet and thinking that for sure she wouldn't be able to give them to me now because she would know that I had been naughty. I didn't tell her that I knew about them until after Christmas.)
I've been reading Little House on the Prairie on and off with Naomi in the evenings. There is so much that is just totally foreign to her - farming, log houses, heat only from one stove. The other day I was between books so I picked up my old copy of Farmer Boy to read for a few minutes while my stomach settled down.
In the book I found several lovely surprises. The first was this awesome inscription inside the front cover. I don't remember Rick or Ron, but I must have felt very strongly about them at some point. And why I felt I needed to draw a library check-out card thingy in the front I don't know. A picture of my feelings as an 8 - 10 year old I guess. The second surprise was a little more sweet: A perfectly preserved flower/weed. You can see the tiny red flower among the much greenery. I love it. I want to frame it. I reminds me of life in the wild woods of Washington State every day after school. Of laying in the grass or the ferns reading. Of free Summers. Of a wonderful phase of my life.
And I find myself wanting to replicate that feeling for my children. When will my children be able to be so free? Even if we lived in the same house in Washington right now, I don't think I could let them run free the way I did as a child. So I must find other ways for them to be free. Other places and ways for my angsty, love-hating, 8 - 10 year old's to be free and independent. And I'm sure they'll read other books more than Laura Ingalls Wilder. Harry Potter and such. But the point is that they READ. And love it. And learn from it the way I did. And feel the exhilaration of living for a moment in a totally different place and time.
That's a freedom they can have even in our living room in urban Virginia.
I feel like I should blog today, but I don't really have anything of significance to say. So I'll just ramble a while I guess. Nothing big has happened this week, but plenty has happened. We had a semi-busy week of appointments, meetings, and commitments.
I got to go to Naomi's school and help with the Kindergarten's 100th Day Of School celebration. It was so fun to see Naomi in her element and meet more of her peers and the other Kindergarten teachers. And to discover who the meany substitute teacher is. (I'm just relieved to find that she's a sub and not someone my children may have to deal with on a regular basis at some point in the future.)
I took Isaiah to a follow up appointment for his mega-ear-infection from two weeks ago. He's been feeling much better but she said he still has fluid in his ears so we have to go back again in another two weeks.
Isaiah's speech therapy teacher moved him to a different time because she finally sees what I've been seeing from Day One - that he would do better on his own than teamed up with an older kid. We're thrilled about that.
The big breakthrough for Asher this week is an "x" on the light switch in the bathroom. I finally figured out that his fear of going to the bathroom by himself had to do with his hatred of the noise the fan makes. Whenever he went in there he didn't want to turn on the lights himself because he was afraid he would accidentally turn on the fan instead. So an "x" below the correct switch has solved all his problems.
Naomi's freak-out this week was over where her future sibling would fit into her room. We've had the same discussion about a dozen times about where we'll move the beds and dresser and how we'll make sure this new baby can't get Naomi's special things, etc, etc. But she still freaks out about it every time she thinks about it. And this from the girl who has been whining for 3 years that she's the only one in the family who "has to sleep alone" since Daddy and I share and Asher and Isaiah share.
I'm feeling so much better it's unbelievable. I guess it takes feeling really, really crappy to be this thankful for how I feel even though I still feel very pregnant and tired and grumpy, etc.
I'm excited that I get to go to the temple tomorrow with a couple of my girlfriends. And then Baby Ethan (Richard's brother, Kevin's, son) gets blessed on Sunday. So a fun weekend to look forward to.
But not as exciting as next weekend when Richard and I take off on a solo trip to a ski resort - where we won't be skiing. We plan to spend our time at the indoor waterpark. And order up one pedicure for me. And plenty of just-plain-laying-around time.
How's that for rambling? It was actually kinda nice to not have to worry about the flow of the post.
Degree of difficulty: Easy Time from start to completion: about 1 hour, that includes drying time (and cleaning faces and getting snacks and laying babies down for a nap)
First, you will need: Freezer paper that is located by the foil in most grocery stores, paint I'm using acrylic paint because I haven't been to the store to get fabric paint, iron, ironing board, x-acto knife, paint brush, the image to stencil and something to stencil on, I'm using a onesie. Trace the image onto the freezer paper. Freezer paper has two sides, one shiny, one not. The shiny side is what fuses to the fabric, so trace your image with the shiny side down, matte side up.
Cut the image out to create the stencil. I'm using three colors for this image, but I only needed two different stencils.
One for the body and the letters. The body will be yellow and the letters black, you just have to be careful. Another stencil for the legs and beak which will both be orange. For the letter P's, I cut out a tiny square of paper that will fit in the circle of the P so it won't be painted on and it will look like a letter p, not a stick figure with a big nose.
Next, turn your shirt inside out and iron a piece of freezer paper on that is big enough to easily cover the part of the shirt you will be painting on from the front. This prevents any bleeding through the front onto the back.
Turn the shirt back to the right side and iron on the first image. I am doing the body and letters first.
Immediately call your five year old in to do the painting. Paint the body yellow
and the letters black. Just be careful not to get black on the yellow.
Peel the stencil off and yipee, it's starting to look like a chick.
Iron on the second stencil. I traced the body of the chick so that I could line it up with what is painted underneath.
Paint orange.
Let dry and peel off.
Almost done, it's not perfect, but I like it that way.
I used the head of a pin to paint an eye.
Now the chick can see properly. Peel off the paper from the inside (I save this paper to iron on the inside of another shirt.)
All finished and waiting for a new baby!
Have fun and beware, once you start it's very difficult to not imagine things to stencil!
Here are the directions again for easier printing.
You will need: Freezer paper that is located by the foil in most grocery stores, paint, iron, ironing board, x-acto knife, paint brush, the image to stencil and something to stencil on.
Trace the image onto the freezer paper. Freezer paper has two sides, one shiny, one not. The shiny side is what fuses to the fabric, so trace your image with the shiny side down, matte side up.
Cut the image out to create the stencil.
Next, turn your shirt inside out and iron a piece of freezer paper on that is big enough to easily cover the part of the shirt you will be painting on from the front.
Turn the shirt back to the right side and iron on the first image.
Immediately call your five year old in to do the painting.
Let dry. Peel the freezer paper off and throw away.
Iron on the second stencil.
Let dry and peel off.
Peel off the paper from the inside of the shirt. Set the paint with an iron or by putting in the dryer.
I've changed some of the settings for comments on this blog. Hopefully it won't really bother anybody. I was just getting way too many Spam-y comments. Sorry. I'd rather you didn't have to type in some wonky looking word or have a specific account to comment under, but the Spam... OH, the Spam...
I'm so pleased that so many of you haven't done freezer paper stenciling... because I get to share it with you! I've never done a tutorial, but I want to for this. I'll try to get it up in the next day or two. Yipee!
You have all GOT to go watch this Old Spice commercial. I am positively dying of laughter right now. It seems like a mock commercial, but I swear it's the real thing - I just saw it on TV. Go to this link and then make sure your watching the video called "The Man Your Man Could Smell Like". And then die of laughter. And report back.
I'm so happy to report that for once, we had the mother of all storms where I actually lived. It was great. We measured snow in our backyard after the storm, 22 inches. The kids were home from school for a whole week. I loved it. Here's Ashby getting ready to make the plunge. Can you see the car? Yeah me either. Our poor BBQ. It doesn't think summer will ever come, can you blame it?
Have you tried freezer paper stenciling? It's awesome and I'm obsessed. Every time I find cheap solid colored shirts, I snatch up couple so we can make them our own. Avery wanted a flower on hers.
I wanted these guys on Luke's. Can you name them? Without cheating...
And last, I sent these to Baby J. I hadn't ever made bibs before and it was fun. There's also some freezer paper business here too. Try it, you'll like it.
I'm not baking a chocolate cake right now just because it sounded good. Not me.
I'm not wearing sweat pants even though I had jeans on earlier to go out and run errands. Not me.
And I certainly haven't been wearing the same sweat pants for about 3 weeks now on a daily basis. Nope. Not me.
I've also recently washed my one pair of jeans that fits me. Because I would never be afraid that if I washed them they might not fit for the next year. Not me.
I'm not behind on laundry. Never.
I did not eat an entire tube of Girl Scout Cookies during naptime. Not me. (But if I had it totally wouldn't be that big a deal because those cookies are tiny!)
I did not stay out until 11pm on Saturday night with girlfriends. Not me. (But if I had it would have been very therapeutic. And yummy.)
And most importantly, and for real, I did NOT get sick this morning! Or yesterday morning! Things are looking up - yes they are! I'm not quite at the end of my first trimester, but I'm already feeling better and feeling very, very thankful for that!!!
I'm linking this up to the blog My Charming Kids and her Not Me Monday. She's lots of fun to follow on Twitter, too, if you're looking for some fun in that way.
Smiles: Face painting, half rubbed off from a long nap, and Oreo crumbs around the mouth: Face painting, meticulously maintained even with a long nap, and more smiles: No pictures of Asher. That's a sign of a good weekend for him. He was far too busy to pause for a photo.
Lots of things come to guys naturally: going to the bathroom, eating, sleeping, getting a good stretch in, staring off into space, and much more. One thing that might not come naturally to us is the ability to spontaneously compliment our wives. I am particularly poor at complimenting people, especially my wife. I just can’t seem to find a good way to bring up the fact that she is wearing a certain color shirt or that she has her hair in a certain style.
“Hey, you’ve got a blue shirt on… … … That’s good.”
“Oh, I see you’ve washed and brushed your hair. Good job.”
So I choose to say nothing.
I set a goal a few years ago to compliment my wife weekly to see if this would become more natural over time. This was a fleeting dream until I had an idea that would prove to be the best of times and the worst of times.
Lesson 33: Scheduling a time to compliment you wife is a risky move, especially if she has access to your calendar.
I began scheduling time at the beginning of each week to provide my wife with a few compliments. Although it never became habitual, I was beginning to impress my wife by at least making attempts on a weekly basis. Things were successful for a few weeks until my wife synchronized our calendars. “What’s this?” she asked herself as she looked at one of my agenda items. I immediately received a call and learned that it’s a sad state of affairs when a husband has to schedule time to compliment his wife. I abandoned this practice at once and reverted back to my pre-calendar state.
My suggestion: Don’t put stuff like this on your calendar. Not only will you get your wife mad, but you will embarrass yourself during a meeting in which your laptop is being used to display an important project. BING! Here comes a reminder to … compliment your wife??? A good idea might be to pre-write a bunch of compliments and then put them in your toiletries drawer. That way you will remember every day (or every few days depending on cleaning habits) to compliment your wife.
Asher has taken to telling me, "It's not there!" at times. Daily recently. What he means is "It's not fair!" It never fails to crack me up.
Isaiah can count five objects out loud. He says, "Wa, Two, Fee, Foe, Fi!" The first thing he counted was fruit snacks and he was very pleased to learn that counting his fruit snacks earned him a second bag of them (an unheard of treat). He tried the trick again today and was sad to see that it didn't work again.
Naomi threw an hour long fit yesterday including many tears and self-inflicted solitude because I wouldn't let her keep all 20 of the papers she brought home from school. I made her pick five of them to keep. It was a sad, sad day. I can't wait until next week when her teachers send home another pack of papers.
I am feeling a little more normal these day (well, normal for pregnant anyway). I ate an egg salad sandwich the other day - which I would normally hate, and I really enjoyed the smell of the raw ground beef I was browning. So I'm definitely pregnant.
Richard is working like mad, but it's so nice to have him working from home. Sometimes a little too nice - it's hard to leave him alone and let him work.
I think Audrey might say "yes!" She has been working really hard this year to get a 4.0! We are so proud of her! I attended her 7th grade award ceremony where she was up on the stage many times for various awards. The one she really wanted was "perfect attendence". But, that didn't happen. Maybe next year!
Those words would come out of my mouth, most of my life as the youngest of 4. You could call me spoiled and I knew it. I still know it :-) Now, I get to spoil my youngest. It is so fun to enjoy Natty's activities with her. knowing that this is my last, I try and take in every second of her childhood...the baby brattiness (do I have a choice?) as well as the sweet hugs I cherish every day. I have enjoyed helping out at her preschool. Here is a little of what we've been up to.
Circle time at preschool. Miss Lindsay is reading a book!We went on a fun field trip to the Children's Museum. Natty has been wanting ride the big yellow bus all her long 3-year-old life! Her wish finally came true. It has been a few years since I've been to the museum. It didn't change much from 7 or so years ago. But it was just as fun! Here is Natty painting her heart out!Working with clay was a favorite at the museum.Natty is working hard as a server in the pretend mexican restaurant. She even served me some awesome (plastic) tostadas!Eventually she got hungry and decided to make herself a plate at the Phillipino cafe.
I keep telling Natty to stop growing...but she just won't listen to me! Until then, I'll keep enjoying our time together!
Here's some of the latest art from Naomi. This piece is actually she and I. I am wearing green and she is wearing purple. We both have pink hair. Note that she even drew little blue pieces of tape on each of the corners. "Because it's a picture of a picture taped to a piece of paper."
Today we needed a good, free, hyper activity for the kids. And those are hard to come by.
A little (well, actually, a lot) of cardboard + tape + the dining room table + a bin of toy cars + 3 crazy kids = FUN
Once the cars really started flying, we realized that we needed a crash pad at the bottom to protect the poor wall. Naomi with her "trophy" and prize winning car. Fun, fun, fun!
Here’s where we answer our readers’ questions. Please don’t blame us if our suggestions don’t work for you; you’re the one taking advice from a donkey.
Lookin’ to get fixed
Dear Donkey and Wife: My wife and I have two kids and aren’t sure if we should have another one. Any advice? We haven’t had any arguments yet. We don’t know how to decide. And what should we do if this is it for us? – Potentially closing up shop
He says: The husband is the winner this time
Shutting down the baby factory is a difficult decision. I don’t think I can give an answer without the full details. Unfortunately there isn’t a blanket answer. I do have an answer for the second question: What should you do if you decide to stop having kids.
There were serious complications when we had our fourth child so we decided to call it quits. Our doctor shared a little piece of wisdom with us that I would like to pass on to you. I think this will help.
He said that undergoing any surgery is serious; whether it’s a vasectomy or getting tubes tied. But he recommended that my wife go through with the procedure if we planned on doing something permanent because it’s my wife who was in danger.
He said to me, “What if you undergo the knife, and then your wife dies some time later and you get remarried to a young lady looking to have kids. What will you do? Reversing a vasectomy is not always successful and you may not be able to give your new wife what she wants.”
My interpretation: I might need to party if my wife dies, and I’ll want all my peeps there to support me.
I thought my wife would go crazy when he said this to us, but she said it made sense. We ended up choosing neither option, but maybe this advice will come in handy for you.
Oh, here’s something else the doctor said that we thought was funny: “You need to be comfortable being sterile.” I still haven’t found a way to work that into a conversation, but I am committed to keep trying.
Yesterday morning I woke up feeling pretty good. I think I've got a handle on this morning sickness finally (now that's it's down to only being *morning* sickness). I got the kids all dressed and ready to go since everybody has school on Thursday's - which means almost non-stop drop-offs and pick-ups for me until noon. Then I ran up to shower and actually get myself dressed for the first time in about two weeks.
While I was in the shower, Isaiah came into my room and sat by the bathroom door (which was open). He whined "Mama" at me a couple of times, but for the most part I ignored him. Shower time is sacred! But pretty soon I noticed that Isaiah was kind of whimpering. I figured Asher had done something mean to him and that he'd get over it soon. But as I got out of the shower I realized that he was pretty upset. He wouldn't stop whining and whimpering and almost crying. He wanted me to pick him up. It was so uncharacteristic that I went ahead and picked him up and cuddled him for a second (buck naked), figuring that would solve the problem. But it didn't. He started full on crying. He wouldn't let me set him down. I started to worry. Was he sick again? He had just been pretty sick four or five days ago. I went looking for throw-up. None to be found upstairs. Was he physically hurt? I tried to ask him but every time I asked him, "Does your foot hurt?", or "Does your head hurt?" the answer was "yes" to it all. Finally I started worrying that he was emotionally traumatized by something. What if something happened downstairs that Isaiah had witnessed? Maybe a serial killer was downstairs slowly massacring my family and saving me for last! (This is the too much Law & Order part)
I braved going downstairs. Shockingly, all was fine. I asked Asher if he knew of anything that had happened to Isaiah, he said no. I asked Richard (who was working in the basement) if he knew of anything that had happened. No.
Anyway, on and on. He really was completely inconsolable. Snacks, cuddles, treats ... nothing could stop the crying. Finally I called our pediatricians office expecting that I'd really have to sell this to the nurse on call as a valid reason for an immediate visit. When I told her he had been crying for an hour and it was unusual, to her credit, she told me to come right in to the office.
So off Isaiah and I went, him crying all the way, to the pediatricians office. (Reason #486 Why It's Great To Have A Husband That Works From Home: leaving not-sick kids at home when taking sick kids to the doctor) It took a whopping 5 seconds with the doctor for her to see that Isaiah had a raging double ear infection. The poor, poor little guy. He was in so much pain!
So now he's highly medicated with antibiotics and Tylenol. And he feels much better - except for the 30 minutes before it's time for more Tylenol. And I feel like a terrible Mom for not having taken him to the doctor sooner when he had that "cold" last week. And I know that he might not have had anything wrong with his ears if I had taken him in earlier - ear infections apparently come on fast - but I still feel like a crap Mom. How can you not when your baby is in pain?
This is another one of those times when nothing really horrible happened, but it was a totally traumatic experience for me anyway. Trying to get dressed while holding a screaming two year old, a frantic call to the school to cancel speech therapy, driving to the doctor with a screaming two year old, sitting in a waiting room with a screaming two year old - all these experiences are traumatic for a Mom.
I don’t do enough writing from the dad perspective, but I know a lot of husbands out there are also fathers. I have four kids and it gets tough to give them all enough attention with the amount of energy I have. So today I will describe a classic game that has been around in my family for generations: BLANKET MONSTER
Step 1: Obtain a blanket
Step 2: Cover yourself with the blanket
Step 3: Crawl around and chase the kids for a minute
Step 4: Retreat and curl up under the blanket
Step 5: Occasionally grab a leg or arm and tickle the kids while you rest on the floor covered up
At this point the kids will help each other escape while you are practically sleeping under the blanket. Once in a while you need to endure a jump to the stomach from the couch, but otherwise it’s smooth sailing. I can keep this game going for 30 minutes while the kids remain entertained.
Alternate version: Instead of trying to sleep, turn the television on and listen to a show. If you have an afghan, you can even watch the show through the little holes. Your kids won’t even notice.
Warning!! Do not try to grab or tickle your wife. While there may be times for that, blanket monster is certainly not one of them. Most women won’t like being attacked by a body-less hand reaching out from under a blanket. I can’t explain it. This is just a dad and kids game.
I welcome information on any other lazy games that you may know about.
So here's the whole story. Because 1) Maybe it'll help someone else and 2) If I don't write it down I'll block it out completely and forget it ever happened.
I had a miscarriage about 8 months ago. It was my second miscarriage. Two miscarriages out of five pregnancies is actually not terrible odds. I think the latest statistic I heard was that one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage. So I'm really within the average, but it still worries us. (Us being my doctor and I) So as soon as I learned I was pregnant again, my doctor and I decided to put me on Progesterone just to be extra safe. Progesterone is basically the hormone that makes the babies. My levels of Progesterone were already normal, but "on the low side of normal". So I went ahead and started taking it.
At first as soon as I took the pill (twice a day) I would get super dizzy. I had to lay down for a solid hour after I took each pill. But after about 5 days that faded away, much to my relief. But then I noticed that I was nauseated all day every day. Not terrible or anything, but there was no relief. I've never been nauseated all day before when I was pregnant. Sure there's plenty of nausea, but there's always some time during the day where I'd get some relief. Usually between 11am and 4pm or so. After a few days of that the nausea got worse and worse. Pretty soon I was in bed all day. And not able to keep anything down. And here I am a week later having not eaten anything more than rice and Saltine's (in very, very small doses) all week. I have no energy since I've eaten basically nothing and I still feel amazingly nauseated.
I even spoke with my doctor about half way through this week. He recommended I not quite but perhaps take the pills both at night right before bed. It didn't help. He said I have 10 days left that he wants me to take these pills and that if I can't give him 10 days, at least give him 5.
I made it 2 more days. And then I quite. Because not eating and quickly loosing weight can't be good for the baby (I lost 6 pounds in the last week). Because I prayed about it and strongly feel that my baby will be fine. Because I am a mother - and I can't be a mother if I can't move. And, I admit it, I'm tired of feeling like crap. I was hoping that I'd feel much better today since I didn't take the pills last night, but unfortunately I only feel a little bit better. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
If I've learned anything from this experience, it's that I am a lucky woman. My pregnancies are normally not so bad. Sure, I'm always tired and sometimes nauseated - but not this bad. I can't imagine if I had to live like this for a solid 3 months or more. I sure wouldn't have plans for as many children as I do if it was always this hard.
I'm not saying that nobody should ever take Progesterone. I'm sure there are times when it is absolutely a miracle drug. And times when all these side effects are totally worth it because it's the only way to make a baby. But I was taking it "just to be safe". So, for me, the awful side effects weren't equal to the possible benefits.
So, that's the story. Now, assuming I start feeling better tomorrow, I'm going to start blocking this all out. I'm really pretty good at that. I'll have forgotten all the details in just a few months. It's one of the good parts of not having a good memory.
Yeah - those are icicles. Three foot long icicles. Which we thought were cool until we started hearing stories about roof collapses. Then we went outside and knocked those suckers down. See how the road behind the kids is actually kinda clear? That was before it snowed another foot yesterday. It's not clear anymore. But the high tomorrow is suppose to be a whopping 36 - so there's hope.
I'm buried under mounds of snow and upset stomach. Today was a true blizzard. At times we could hardly see the houses across the street. The Government is closed for the 4th day in a row - that's some kind of record. The backyard is so deep in snow that instead of stepping down two steps out the backdoor, you'd have to step UP (if you were brave enough to go that way). The natives (children), who have done so well up till now, have finally become restless. And every time I move it upsets my stomach even more. I'm actually hoping that it's the flu. At least if it's the flu there's an end in site.
We told the kids about the baby this evening since I've been so sick. We figured they have a right to know why Mom has kind of checked out of life lately. It was so fun to see the looks on Asher and Naomi's faces. We were all sitting on my bed and when we told them Naomi's jaw dropped and Asher started bouncing up and down. Naomi asked if it was coming out right now and Asher asked if the baby was Poochy. It was adorable. Isaiah just happily sat on my lap, having no idea that he'll be slowly kicked out of that prime real estate over the next 7 months.
I had a doctor's appointment today and he told me that my official due date is September 18. I had been thinking it was October sometime. And then as I was driving home I heard Green Day singing their song When September Ends.
Funny, eh?
Not so funny is the fact that they just canceled school for the rest of this week. :( And Monday is a holiday. So the kids don't go back to school until a week after tomorrow.
I've been mockingly calling it "The Blizzard of 2010" for two days, and then today I turned on the TV and there was the bold headline. It's officially "The Blizzard of 2010". And, no, it's not over yet.
Richard has been religiously clearing our sidewalk every hour on the hour in the hopes that he can stay ahead of the storm. But it's been snowing at an average of an inch per hour for about 24 hours now. Nobody can keep up with that! The kids love it, of course. Richard changed his plan from building an igloo to building a snow ramp for the kids to slide on. And it wasn't too hard a task since there was already a huge snow drift in front of the house. In the picture below Naomi is about on ground level, and Asher is only about half way up the hill Daddy nicely packed down for them. Here's Naomi at the top of the hill, with Richard at the bottom - you can see that it's nearly up to his shoulders. And Asher is stuck in the snow. And here's a fun video of Naomi sliding down. You can see that Asher is totally stuck in the snow. Shortly after I turned off the camera Richard pulled him out. But poor Asher's boots stayed buried in the snow. And that began the series of sock changes. He went through three pairs of socks because the snow kept sucking his boots off no matter how tight I strapped them. Richard suggested that I duct tape them on. Maybe we'll try that tomorrow. Also in this video you can hear Isaiah saying, "In, Mama." repeatedly and me ignoring him.
I'm not sure what the latest total snowfall is, but they've been saying that this storm is even worse than they expected. Just when they thought it would start calming down, it kicked up a notch. School is already canceled for Monday and Tuesday.
Time at home with the kids is nice, but if we can't make it out of the house until Wednesday that'll make 4 straight days of being inside together. That's a lot.
20 inches of snow are expected here in the next 24 hours. They're calling it a "Top 5 storm", meaning it will be among the 5 biggest storms on record here. The grocery store was a total zoo yesterday. School was canceled for Friday by Thursday afternoon - and it isn't going to start snowing until this afternoon (Friday). People are kinda acting like the end of the world is coming.
I had a "nickel auction" last night - guests each bring $5 worth of nickels and 3 things to auction off. Only 4 people came which was a big bummer. But it was still fun to sit around and chat with girlfriends. The biggest buzz was created by a pair of earrings that went for 45 nickels.
Our family has big plans for building an igloo tomorrow.
And lastly, I am finally with child. The latest Worth should arrive late September to early October. I am flat out admitting that I hope this is a girl. Because, one, my family goes girl, boy, boy, girl (and I'm that #4 girl!) so it would be fun to repeat that, and two, because this baby is sleeping in Naomi's purple princess castle room whether it's a boy or girl. We are so excited. I've only been to the Dr. once yet, but things look good. I actually managed to keep this a secret from most of my friends and family for a whopping three weeks. That's a new record for me. I'm not very good at keeping this kind of thing to myself. It's too exciting! Plus, I feel like poo and I want people to know why I'm suddenly a total party pooper. The Dr. has me on progesterone (just to be safe) twice a day and each time I take that little round pill it makes me so dizzy that I have to lay down for an hour. But I'm not complaining (much) because I'm so happy that this baby is finally on his/her way.
Last week I challenged myself to sit down for every bathroom visit to better understand the female point of view. My wife has made outrageous claims over the years by stating that she never knows what is going to come out when she sits on the toilet. Read more here.
Results
There were certainly no surprises. I have found a few women who agree with my wife’s claims, but the majority of women I have spoken to tell me that my wife is unique. Perhaps they are lying to me, but it sounds like my wife is on her own with this one.
I couldn’t make it the entire 7 days. I made it for 3 days and then had to call it quits. I did learn that sitting down on the toilet every time is terrible. I had no room to put my stuff down, I had to waste an extra minute every trip, I was worried about drinking anything because I didn’t want to go to the bathroom, and of course I was worried about the germs.
Overall it was a great experiment, but one which I will not try again.
I have not forgotten about you. Please forgive my lack of attention. See the thing is, it's cold and dark and boring and January runs right into February and I swear spring will never come. I know it's not your fault. Please accept this post as a token of my gratitude for your willingness to stick around. Thanks, Chelsea
This is Luke. This is the day he dressed himself. He insisted on swim trunks and jacket, I insisted on the shirt. This is Luke being mad because I was taking the pictures, he was not. More about his anger issues later. I took him to the doctor this week and he's tall and skinny 31 3/4 inches high and 22.5 pounds heavy. He was mad there too.
This is some stuff I sent to new baby E. We are happy to have him in the family. Unhappy he is so far away. I liked how these things turned out, burp clothes, pants and onesies. Pants are folded because they were weird, but I sent them anyway.
This is the bench that Roger built. We knew we wanted a bench when we removed the closet. Yes, it doesn't have a top yet, but baby steps people, baby steps. I had to talk Roger into believing he could construct this. I swear that man can build anything, it's awesome. Total cost up to now: $4.28. Still needs a top, hopefully it will have one soon.
Close up. I'll post before, during and after pictures after it's not topless anymore.
Luke has serious anger issues. I guess it's difficult to be 16 months old. He hates to be told no, he gets mad when he can't figure something out. We laugh. We are excellent parents. Here he is in action trying to conquer a gallon of distilled water. Note his dismay at not being able to open it or lift it. Note his glee when he notices I've got the camera. Is it too early for some anger management? Maybe I could go with him, I blow my top sometimes too.
Audrey recently switched piano teachers and had recital a few weeks ago. She has really blossomed as a pianist the last few months. It was fun to see her perform. Great job Audrey! Thank you to my friend, Sherri who first referred me to the new teacher, and second for taking pictures of the recital and giving me a copy!
It's hard to beleive that cheer season is coming to an end. What a great year it's been! MSHS recently competed in the Washington State Cheer competition. They scored 6th in a very competitive division. Way to go Wildcats! What an incredible growing year for Becky. We are so proud of her!
SOPHIA!!! Happy New Year! True to tradition...we ate our grapes at midnight to see who would eat 12 (for each of the 12 months of the year) the quickest as the clock strikes 12. The winner has good luck all year long! The older kids felt like it might be the last year for Sophia to start a minute early. I'd have to agree...her head start proved to be a little too helpful.
During Christmas Break we enjoyed having Oliver home! One thing we did was head over to the Cedar River Watershed in North Bend. The education center was having a family fun day and we were able to do all sorts of things including learning more about conservation, crafts, and meeting Mishka the bear dog. It was so fun, I think we'll do it next year. While the girls did some crafts, Oliver borrowed my camera and took a few great shots!
The forecast today said that it would start snowing in the afternoon, that the snow would start sticking after dark, and that there would be accumulation of 1 to 3 inches.
I was feeling pretty stressed about that since I have Young Women's tonight - putting me out of the house until 9:00 or later. It was on my mind all day - how scary that drive home late at night could be. I don't have 4WD or even anti-lock brakes on the van. Maybe I should take Richard's car? Maybe I should claim to be sick?
But around 3:00 today it was decided that our Young Women's activity was canceled. By 4:00ish when it started snowing I was feeling very cozy. No more stress. I looked out my kitchen window at the beautiful snow falling gently and felt warm and protected. I felt safe and even comforted by the snow. I felt loved by a Heavenly Father who sent such beautiful weather.
Then I remembered that Richard is still at work and is planning on staying late. So he'll have to drive home after dark. And the snow lost all it's beauty. It didn't feel safe and comforting - it felt harsh and menacing. Is it starting to stick? What if the wet spots from the previous weekends snow melting freeze over and then there's ice with snow on top of that? Maybe Richard should come home right now? Maybe it's too late.
I'm sure when Richard gets home the snow will go back to being soft and cozy and beautiful. It's amazing to me though how my feelings for the same thing can change just depending on my state of mind. I know I'm kind of a worry-er. But do I do this to myself very often without even realizing?
How often do I loose sleep (or peaceful daytime) over what are really insignificant things when if I just chilled out for a bit things would be fine?
Just kidding. Not really. I've never even played the lottery. But I feel like I've just won some sort of lottery or prize. ... Except I paid for it...
It's a brand new freezer! Fully stocked with meats, fish, prepared meals, and veggies! Mmmmmmm! We signed a contract with Country Pride Food Services. And, ya know, we paid for all this food and the freezer, but they delivered it and stocked it and sorted it and will refill it with whatever we want (and pay for) whenever we want!
I've been living with one tiny little above-the-fridge freezer for way too long. I can never stock up on bread or cheese or (ahem) cookie dough. I could never do the "make two meals instead of one and freeze the extra" thing. But now I can! Wa-whoo!
Every time I tell somebody about this they say something like, "Oh, now you can freeze ..." And insert their favorite thing to have on hand in the freezer. I'm most excited about bread. We always have to make a mid-week extra trip to the store for bread. What about you? What are you so happy to freeze (or would be if you had a big freezer)?
Ever walk into a room and been completely surprised? Sure. Ever walk into the bathroom and been completely surprised? Of course. Every time I see the hair straightener on the counter still turned on after ten hours of not being used. Ever go to use the toilet and been surprised at what your body is telling you to do? If you are a female, you are probably nodding in the affirmative. If you are a male, you are probably completely confused if this has never come up in your marriage.
Situation: I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth. My wife decided to infiltrate the room and sat on the toilet. Suddenly she yelled, “Quick. Get out!”
Confused, I asked, “What’s happening?” I was thrown out only later to hear an explanation from my wife. “Sorry. I thought I just needed to pee, but then realized something else had to happen.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked. She then explained that whenever she sits down on the toilet she is surprised by what her body might require: maybe it’s to pee, maybe poo, and maybe just some gas. My mind was blown. I always know exactly what is going to happen when I enter the bathroom. In fact, my mind subconsciously develops a plan and I am in and out of there with great efficiency. I know some guys go into the bathroom with a magazine and a plan to stay for an hour, but the fact remains, they have a plan and they know what the future holds.
My wife said, “Things would be totally different if you had to sit down every time you had to pee. You would wouldn’t always know what would happen next.” We have argued about this for several years, but I am finally ready to resolve this debate.
Challenge: For one week I will sit down on the toilet every time I need to go to the bathroom, no matter what my initial plan is. I will then document the experience and provide a report to you. Men, feel free to join me in this challenge. The more data points the better. Please document your experiences in the comment section. Let’s not get too graphic though. I have a high suspicion that this oddity is either unique to my wife or to women in general.
I have been such having a blast lately figuring out embroidery. I don't recall ever before sitting down to learn a variety of stitches (although I'm sure my mother tried to teach me at some point). So I did what every self-respecting Worth does - I went out, bought a book, and taught myself. I have learned a whopping 3 stitches so far. My favorite is the wrapped backstitch (because it seems very forgiving of my messy,uneven stitches). I think I'm enjoying it so much because it's seems to be a great way to perk up these drab Winter days.
This is the second set of burp clothes that I've done. These ones are for Richard's baby sister, Karen (shh, don't tell Karen!), who is about to have her first baby. I love baby presents with the child's name on them because they're perfect for keeping as heirlooms. (Which sounds very snotty, like I deem these heirloom-worthy, but really it's just that I appreciate gifts like that, so I enjoy giving them and thinking that the receiver will enjoy them the way that I would.)
Don't look too closely at my amateur stitches, but I'm very happy with how these turned out! (My secret weapon is a fabric pen with disappearing ink which makes it so that I can write on the cloth and embroider right over it, but then any visible trace of the ink disappears within 72 hours.)
Side note: I am totally inspired by this blog. I think my next project may be a little stitched house that looks like ours.
Just wanted to share some pics of the growing belly. This one was at about 25 weeks... ...and this one was just a few weeks ago!
All things considered, I'm feeling pretty well and am getting anxious and excited... and of course a bit nervous :). Her little kicks are getting stronger by the day - I bet she's just about as excited to get out of there as we are for her to come out. March 7th here we come!
So far we've been calling her Jessica - we both really like the name. Of course there's always people that say "we had a name for our baby, and then the baby came out and just didn't fit the name!" so we'll see how it goes when we do see her. But Jessica Kalena Hess is what we have in mind (Kalena is Karen in Hawaiian).
Well, most of the snow had just about melted over the last few weeks when we got hit last night with a few more inches of fresh, beautiful, and awesome-to-pack snow.
While waiting for me to put my shoes on this morning (a fun endeavor since I actually decided to tie them today... ugh) Jared went outside and made a quick 1 minute snowman. When we came home from our Saturday errands.... this is what followed...
We're such kids :) One of our new neighbors was outside getting her mail just in time to see it. His comment to her puzzled face "I built it, I can destroy it" :)
In the corporate world executives strive to develop the next wave of successors to be ready for eventual promotion opportunities. Without a fresh pool of qualified talent, disaster can strike when an executive is suddenly removed from office because of death, fraud, illness, or other unanticipated reasons. Although the impact to a company can be devastating if a successor isn’t in the wing when an executive leaves, the results are certainly more disastrous when a successor for your wife is in the wing.
Lesson 32: Do not engage in any conversation that results in a succession plan for your wife, especially when that conversation is with your wife.
Several years ago my wife asked me what I would do if she died. “What kind of woman would you go for?” she asked. I thought about it for a while and innocently gave some answers. “Small, cute, smart, blonde, rich, spiritual.” She responded positively and then asked me to identify some people we know who might fit some of my descriptions.
I’m not sure why, but the alarms weren’t going off in my head. “Hmmm,” I thought. I then opened my mouth and that’s where the trouble started as I provided several names of people we have known who might be good replacements should tragedy strike. She began questioning me, “Why her? What’s so great about her?” And then, “Really? Do you find her attractive? Is there something I should know?”
Struggling, I tried to crawl up the carefully polished, aluminum slide that I was suddenly faced with. It was as if I had socks on my feet and hands – I was only going down. In fact, I was questioned for the next few weeks at random to explain myself and what made me name a certain person.
My suggestion: Never ever suggest that your wife could be replaced with a successor. What’s the point? It only throws doubt in her mind. Some might be tempted to rattle off some nasty ladies as successors thinking this is a good idea. Don’t do this either. Although your wife might feel safe as you mention grotesque people, she will wonder if she is in the same league as these beasts. That plan will backfire. Instead, when your wife asks this questions, tell her, “I pray for your safety every day and plan on loving you forever. No one could ever fill your shoes.” She’ll buy that because that’s what she wants to hear. Leave the succession planning to corporate experts.
Last year sometime in January we were at K-mart and noticed the section of Christmas items that were 90-98% off, so we decided to stock up and store it until Christmas rolled around since we didn't really have much by way of Christmas decor. It was awesome to get a good deal and a good start for our first Christmas together. So a few weeks before Christmas we got it all out and decorated outside our apartment...
...it was tediously fun (and somewhat cold).
Also included was this Christmas tree (these cost like... $80 or so, and we got it for $8! sweet deal!). Oh, and thanks to our moms for the ornaments!
Christmas Eve we spent with Jason and Margaret and their family. We had a blast. And we made crepes for Christmas morning!! YUM! Thanks again Margaret! Then we came home that night so that we could have our own Christmas morning together...
We had fun spoiling each other...
And eating yummy crepes...
...which is a great Hess tradition that I definitely loved making part of our own traditions. Not only were they yummy, but Jared was so sweet to get breakfast all ready while I set up and had fun with a new present that he got me - not that Christmas is all about presents, but I just have to brag about how good he is to me! Now... this wasn't something we splurged for on a whim, it is something that we've been saving up for as an investment for me to be able to work from home when the baby comes. I thought we'd be saving up for months and months still, but Jared was amazing and surprised me with it for Christmas!!! (and, it was on sale so we had to take advantage of it!!)
He's so great! We had a fun filled Christmas break and really really really enjoyed being able to spend two full weeks together without work & school - enjoying Christmas, our anniversary and New years together!
Naomi can read. She just doesn't know she can read. She refuses to admit it. She's so held up by the fact that she has to take her time and concentrate that she can't see that she just finished an entire book. I am anxious for her to figure it out (figure out that she's already figured it out, that is) because I just know she'll be so happy to sit and read for hours.
So, that's why I'm calling this her slow leap. Here's a little video of her reading. You don't have to watch it - I won't be offended - but I had to put it up for posterity... and cuteness.
Isaiah has hit a big jump forward in his learning to speak. He suddenly jumped to trying to say words even if he can't really say it right. It's a very exciting bit of progress. The other day we were walking in a parking lot and he said, "Ho me ha!" So I held his hand. Another day we were at the store and he saw a Diego backpack and said, "ba pa!". So what could I do but buy him the backpack? Like I said, this is really very exciting.
But there are still a few adorable Isaiah-isms that I know I should break him of using, but they're just so cute that I have a hard time finding the motivation.
ew ew ew ew = Diego ha ha = dog ho ho = Christmas or Santa eh me = help me wo mo = one more (usually said with one pudgy finger extended to illustrate)
I'm rather desperate for him to learn to speak, but at the same time I'll miss these little things. I guess that's true for any little person who's growing up. You always miss the phase they're just growing out of (well, most of them anyway).
And while we're talking talking, here's the first 30 words that Isaiah really learned to say correctly: Mama, Dada, wa-wa (water), bubbles, bye bye, nigh-nigh(t), one more, me, you, more, no, whoa, yeah, ball, uh oh, hi, ow, wow, boo, hot, achoo, what, why, baby, pee, poo, new, no way, go, one.
Christmas morning, 2009. Seems my blog entries are fewer and farther in between...feast or famine at times. Ok, I'm only a month late at getting Christmas documented, but at least it's not Valentines Day yet! Christmas morning seemed a little quiet this year. But, we certainly enjoyed our "us" time. Here come the lazies who slept in until 7:30am. Let the games begin! Santa brought a kitchen and new leotard for Natty!
New basketball duds for Celeste!
I-pod for the Tween!
New tires for Becky (and her car). I know, BORING gift! She did get a few little things to open too :-)
"Every 1st grader has a DS, Mom." I guess Santa wanted to make sure Sophia wasn't left out.
Presents for Dad...the home/school-made kind are the best!!
Pretty much immediately upon my arrival home from my trip, Richard took off for a conference. The conference happens to be near our house, so technically he's been sleeping at home all week - but I still have hardly seen him. He comes home long after I'm asleep and leaves within 30 minutes of us all waking up. At several points in the week our house was a kind of "home base" for other people who are working on/attending this same conference. The video below is what my house looked like all day on Wednesday (and yes, that's a genuine green screen you'll see). The link below that is to a blog post from one of these techies that will give you a picture of my house on Friday night.
There will be a couple more guys hanging out and sleeping at our house tonight. Nothing personal to them, they're really all very nice and well mannered, but I'm thinking it might be an excellent night to go see a chick flick by myself.
I had to do a little searching to find the best way to donate money to the Haiti earthquake relief. So since I did all the work, I thought I'd give you the link if you're interested.
*I wrote the following on the day that I found out I was pregnant this time around, but didn't publish it on my blog. For the record, I did manage to keep the news of my pregnancy mostly to myself for a month or so. Getting super sick made it harder to keep to myself since I felt like I needed an excuse.*
I miscarried about 6 months ago. And it was hard to tell everybody or to let the word of my miscarriage trickle down the same way that my pregnancy had. A month or two later people were still asking me how the pregnancy was going and it was always awkward and hard. So I swore that I would stop my habit of announcing my pregnancies the second I knew I was pregnant. I swore I'd wait at least a couple of months.
But today I found out I'm pregnant. And it's big news! It took me 6 months to get pregnant this time - the longest stretch yet. And I was really starting to stress about it. And people know I was stressing about it. And now, knowing that it's finally real again, all I want to do is call everybody in my phone book and start bragging. I admit it, it's selfish, but I want to hear the "Ohhh! Yeah!!! I'm so happy for you!!!" And I want to start talking names and room planning and all the other fun details about welcoming another baby into the world.
But I don't want to have to talk about a miscarriage again. I really don't want to HAVE a miscarriage again, but since that's out of my control I'll settle for just not having to talk about it.
So I'll try to sit on this news. Except, I already called Angela and Mom. I HAD to tell them! And then Ruth called and it didn't seem right to not tell her. And every time I talk to my friend Stephanie she asks me if I'm pregnant yet, so I'm sure I'll let it spill to her pretty soon. And when we start talking about Girl's Camp in Young Women's, I'll have to admit that there's no way I'm spending the whole week up there, because I'll be 7 months pregnant at the time. And if I go to book club or get together with any of my girlfriends, I'm sure to spill it then, too.
But I'll try to keep the count down. I'll try to keep it to honest-to-goodness good friends. People who I'd tell about a miscarriage anyway.
But who'm I kidding? I'll be lucky if I can keep this from going public for 2 WEEKS, let alone 2 months. It's just too exciting!!!
I'm officially back from my week-long trip ... Physically if not mentally. I have never had such a hard time coming back home. I love home and all the people in it, but my personal space bubble had expanded to a size larger than toddlers permit. I was use to people talking to me with respect and being polite. Home was a harsh reality. But don't worry, after just one day my personal space bubble is back to non-existent. There are goobers on my shoulders again. Life is back to normal.
But let's do a little flashback and show you some more of my trip. I did NOT take enough pictures in Oregon! You already saw the pictures of Stacy and I at the falls, here's one of my with my nephews Scott and Andrew. Andrew made me feel especially loved when he cried to his Mom, "You're hogging Aunt Nancy!" It was so fun to get to be the fun Aunt instead of the cousin's Mom. Also in Oregon, I was introduced to Zuumba by Stacy, who is an instructor. Ate so much food that I was still full when I woke up the next morning. And shopped 'til I dropped with Stephanie as my person shopper.
Then it was on to Denver to meet up with my college roomies, Amanda, Shanae, and Erica. Here's Amanda with her sweet baby Kyra.
We ate out and enjoyed being served instead of doing the serving. And, yes, we talked about our kids for a good portion of the time. We ARE still Mom's! Below are Erica and Shanae. It was our tradition to drink A&W and eat peanut butter M&M's. We use to have to pool our money to buy one bag of M&M's. Our tummies have apparently matured a bit, and could barely handle the combo of root beer and candy. Erica is learning a new hobby. Photography. Below is all four of us at the fanciest hotel I've ever been in: The Brown Palace. We felt very pampered and loved that people were eager to jump to our assistance whenever asked. Amanda and I at a 50's diner. Who knew that Indian Poker could be this much fun? We were totally dieing in fits of giggles by this point in the evening. And to top it off we bought a copy of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and took turns reading it. It was hysterical ... and gory! But nobody can beat Shanae's English accent.... Except maybe an actual Englishmen. These are memories that will get me through many a tough day of parenthood. It was just so, so, SO much fun!
And the kids and Richard were even still alive when I got back!
Greetings from Oregon! I'm having a wonderful time! I've done a lot of playing and resting and sleeping and eating and shopping and site seeing. These pictures are from Multnomah Falls. It was very wet! Uncle Carl let me borrow his raincoat or else I would have gotten totally wet. Tonight I played games with cousins Cameron and Hyrum and Andrew and Scott. Scott gives me lots of loves and it makes me miss you kids even more. I love you! ~ Mommy
We miss you Mommy. Glad you're having so much fun.
Things are alright here. We haven't left much. Oh, except today. We went and saw baby Ethan. And held him. My goodness were the kids cute. Here are some pictures for you to enjoy.
Happy Bithday Sophia! We headed over to the Family Fun Center to celebrate Sophia turning 7. Unfortunately, Natty was running a fever, so Tim stayed home with her. Cousins, Elise and Margot joined us for a evening of fun.
These girls always have fun together! They came home with us after the party for their second sleepover of Winter Break.
Miss Margot enjoying a little cake
Sophia and her big sisters! Happy Birthday Blue Eyes Sophia!
These are the remnants of my Christmas baking for teachers, friends and neighbors. Yes...the DOG! She has been having sneaky issues lately...likes to wait until the kitchen is empty and goes sniffing for goodies left on the counter. Since this day she's consumed a dozen Krispy Kremes (in a closed box), a loaf of fresh bread, and probably other things I don't even know about! I thought I was doing good and making sure anything on the counter was pushed way back or put away, however this morning she jumped up on the kitchen table and knocked over our fruit basket and took an orange back to her bed. Do dogs really like fruit? She's getting desperate! If you follow me on facebook, you'll see there was quite a debate on whether I beat my dog or not. Hmm...after this, what do you think?
Don't let her sweet face fool you! Her face is sweet and so is her tooth!
Could it be true?!...Becky is 17! Tim and I took her out for an evening of shopping and dinner and then we enjoyed a Cold Stone ice cream cake with the family. Happy Birthday Rebecca!
Of course I forgot my camera at Natty's Winter gymnastics show. Thanks goodness for cell phone cameras! She was VERY shy and almost didn't perform. She loves her little class once a week, but when it came time to show off her stuff in front of everyone, she had her first experience with stage fright. She had already taken off her costume at this point. Getting a little gift (her bear) at the end of the show made it all worth it! Also, knowing she got a date with mom and dad at our local burger joint, put a smile on her face when all was said and done!
The Donkey shares some of The Wife’s intimate journal memories and stories from her childhood experiences on a rural Michigan farm. Grammatical errors and farm-talk left in for effect. (Read the original debate: Down on The Farm?)
July 4 – Independunce Day
I think the fourfth of July is one of my favorite holidays. First of all I love that we defeeted the Britush at the Elmo. I wonder if thats where that Sesume Street charakter got his name from. Second I love fireworx. We couldnt afford none but Pa created his own. He spent the gas money for the car and got Jiffy Pop and started roastin it. Then he took some dung balls from the field and lit them on fire and placed them on top of the Jiffy Pop. Eventally the Jiffy Pop exploded and the poop went shootin off into the night. We ran all around trying to avoid fallin poop. Pa howled somethin awful at the site. Ma laffed too. Sadly Ezekiel got a poop ball to the head and it burned him a little. I hope he comes over tomorrow still.
FifthI love watermelon. We couldnt git none this year since the saloon was all out so Ma shaved some ice and dripped some chicken blood and sugar into it. Then she put some beetles in there. Next she squished the ice into balls like watermelons. The ice tasted good but i didn’t like the beetles none. i spat them out at Liza-Jane. She got mad cause she hates beetles and therefore watermelons.
Anyways I love the fourfth. Plus today we put hay in Jethros overalls and he had a horrible itch all night.
I'm sorry, Nancy is out of the office right now. She is in Oregon or Colorado visiting girlfriends. She isn't taking any complaints for the entire week. No snot will reside on her shoulder. She will only be wiping her own mouth or...er... anything else.
If you have any whining, complaints, requests, etc you will have to deal with them yourself or wait until she returns next Monday. (No guarantees that she'll do anything about it then, either, but she won't even be processing Whine Applications until her return).
When my Mom was in town last month we wanted to go see a model train display at Union Station. But instead we drove around D.C. for two hours because we could never find the parking garage.
So today we decided to give it another shot at a closer location that we knew we could get to - with free abundant parking. So we got the kids all excited about it and headed off. ... But we only brought a credit card and they only took cash. Doh!!! Foiled again!!!
Luckily, next door was an indoor carnival! And they happily took our credit card. (Not so lucky was the cost of the carnival - an arm and a leg plus half your spleen. But what could we do at that point?) The kids bounced in bounce houses, did science experiments, watched ballerinas, ate candy, rode rides, etc. All inside - because it was like friggin 20 degrees outside with 40 mph winds!
It was a good compromise and a fun Saturday, but I still really want to take those boys to see some model trains! What's a girl gotta do?
I can't believe our glorious Christmas break is almost over. I get depressed just thinking about it. We have had so much fun. The girls were so excited for Christmas. I think Roger may have been even more excited.
The kids got new pajamas on Christmas Eve. This is pretty typical of our attempts to get Luke to do anything other than what he wants to do.
Luke got a new bike for Christmas. He's holding some bouncy balls in his left hand. The balls and a snack container were the big hits with Luke (note to self, don't spend more than $2 on the kid)
The girls both got Wii controllers and nun chucks. However there was no Wii. We opened all the presents under the tree and no Wii system. Ashby being the very kind heart she is commented a few times that maybe we should ask Santa to bring it next Christmas. After all presents were opened we found a suspicious note in the tree. In it Santa explained that he had dropped something in the toy room on his way over the house. Lo and behold it was the Wii. Ashby's never been so excited. She's done nothing but play the Wii since.
If you're in the neighborhood come on over and the girls would love to challenge you to a game of bowling, both girls consistently do better than Roger and I. I can't believe it's back to the grind in two days. I already can't wait for next year. We hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and a very happy new year. We love you all and thanks for all your love and friendship over the years. Happy 2010.
I've never been one for New Year's Resolutions. I've always felt like I didn't really have any goals that needed to be dragged out over an entire year. But I think my feelings on the subject have changed. I'd like to make a few goals to keep up for an entire year. I feel like in my life with these wonderful little kids, it's too easy to just let time pass. To just be thankful that I made it alive through that one day and then wake up and do it again the next day. I should be working on more than just living life. I should be working on living life better.
I've seen on some blogs that they choose a "Word of the Year" or something like that. A theme for the year, basically, summed up into one word. So I've decided to keep my individual New Year's Resolutions to myself, but to share with you my Word of the Year.
Increase
Pretty vague, I know. But the idea is that that one word will remind me of all my individual resolutions in all their different areas - to increase my spirituality, physical strengths, mothering skills, wifely duties, and cleanliness.
So welcome to my Year of Increase! Let the increase begin!
*As "bonus reading", this talk may help you understand what I am thinking when I say "increase".
Richard and I have been having so much fun playing with our new Cricut. To use the Cricut you have to have special cartridges that are kinda like memory cards with certain images on each one. If you want some new image, you have to buy a new cartridge - which cost somewhere in the $80 each department. So rather than invest all kinds of money into cartridges, my computer-savvy hubby bought me a computer software that can turn any image into a basic shape that the Cricut can cut out. So now we never have to buy the expensive cartridges!
One of my first thoughts when Richard explained how the software works was "silhouettes!". I've wanted silhouettes of the kids for a long time. I even know where I'll hang them. But it's a lot of work to do it all by hand. Yesterday for Family Home Evening we took profile pics of the kids and then as soon as those kids were in bed, we got to work. It turned out that the software (which, by the way, is called Sure Cuts Alot 2) couldn't quite handle all the work by itself. So it turned into a collaborative effort between Richard on his computer using Photoshop and me on my computer using Sure Cuts Alot. In the end it worked!!!! It took so long that we only got one done last night, but look!
That's my little Asher's silhouette! Look at his cute little nose and chin. I just love it! I can't wait to do the other kids' and get them framed.
Ever open a present and wonder what possessed the person who bought it to actually wrap and deliver it? I’m sure many of us husbands have been guilty of this in the past.
Does the following sound familiar? It’s last minute and you decide to grab something off the shelf just so you can say you had a present under the tree. “At least she can open something on Christmas. She can always return it.” This approach has worked with moderate success in the past, but wives are catching on. They don’t want just anything. They want thought. They want planning. And now, they want us to make the return for the poorly chosen gift. What will we do? Luckily the other day I had a flash of inspiration that will help you next year. It’s based on an experience I had last week.
My friend told me he bought his wife a jewelry box for Christmas. He had noticed that his wife’s box was falling apart. I guess this guy was going for husband of the year award or something. Anyway, he went to some fancy place and got conned by the saleswoman to purchase a jewelry box for $40. When he showed me the box I almost died. It was clear with bright, colorful circles all over it. It looked like something a little girl would keep her My Little Pony toys in. He decided to show the box to a girl at work for a second opinion. She also laughed and said it looked like it belonged to a third grader. He was panicked because it was two days before Christmas and he did not have time to return the item.
I asked how this could have happened. He mentioned that he and his son were in the shop and saw this one and picked it out. “Wait a minute,” I said. “Your son was with you?” He said yes.
“Problem solved,” I exclaimed. “Just tell her that your son picked it out. Tell her that you had seen another one that was better for a mature woman, but you couldn’t deny your son the opportunity to participate in his own mother’s Christmas present. Do you think she can actually complain knowing that you thoughtfully planned to include your children? Of course you need to make sure your son is present when she opens it. You won’t be bringing any gifts back this year – that box is a keeper!”
He asked, “Do you think she will buy it?”
“Of course she will. How could she not?”
He asked several women at work if they would fall for the story and they all said they would. The men he asked applauded the idea and pronounced it as a true Christmas miracle. I got a text on Christmas morning from him that simply said, “Your idea worked.”
Another satisfied customer. Feel free to use this for anniversaries, holidays, and of course birthdays. I’m not sure how far one could take this, but I think next year I will try this approach and get my wife some soda for my office. “Sorry, the kids really thought you would want the soda so you would have something for me.”
